On the surface, they seem to be happy, shiny women leading full lives. They have a booming social life, diaper-clad kids who already take taekwondo and grooming classes, and they set off to exotic locales for vacations thrice a year. These women are well-turned out, and make for wonderful, knowledgeable conversationalists. Scratch the surface further, and one is taken by surprise! These women hold degrees from prestigious universities, but unfortunately they haven’t had the opportunity to work post-study. In other words, the degree certificates lie dormant in a file, somewhere next to their equally redundant wedding trousseau.
Recently I ran into one such woman at a social gathering. Besides exchanging the usual pleasantries, the conversation steered towards more serious topics such as the current political climate, role of higher education, big data and its privacy concerns, and so on. She enlightened me on a range of topics. At the end of our 45-minute conversation, I felt satiated, much as one would feel at the end of a productive day. That lady had an enviable degree in economics from a reputed university in the United States. On returning home, she was made to settle for a life of domesticity, in a “business family”, wherein the men of the family conducted business, and the women remained primarily in the kitchen.
These women were not expected to necessarily work in the kitchen, however; preparing menus, rearing and raising kids, dollying up and socialising is all that is expected of them. As one would’ve imagined, the economics got lost among the pots and the pans. On rare occasions, it rises beyond the traditional confines of home and “the family business affairs”, and flows effortlessly, enthralling all.
Educating girls has been an important issue, relentlessly pushed by various governmental bodies at a global level. In several developing economies, if girls are allowed to be born they are saddled with housework and start taking care of their siblings at a very young age. Hence they drop out of school. This happens in the lower rungs of society, wherein the resources are meagre and are thus allocated only to the male offspring.
However, the women in the higher rungs of society gave challenges of a different kind. The women belonging to the upper echelons have access to tertiary education both in India and abroad. Alas, most of them aren’t “allowed” to work before marriage! After marriage, they only work if their coveted degrees manage to “fit” in the business of the family, otherwise they remain reduced to a piece of paper. Besides bringing psychological stress to the woman, this practice affects the economy of the country, when half its population is not “allowed” to work, despite being qualified to do so.
This complicated issue needs to be addressed at a societal level. This is a society that does give girls an opportunity to study and visit foreign pastures, but not to fly higher and carve their own destiny. Wings are given, but they are clipped just in time, lest the girl becomes ‘too independent’ or ‘too opinionated’. This is a form of measured empowerment.
Let education be the new, and the only form of dowry. Those certificates should not be dug from under the burden of wedding finery; instead they should be used.
seeratsandhu25@yahoo.com
