A portmanteau, or mash-up in millennial-speak, of phone and snubbing: when you are on your phone while in the company of others, whether it is at a party or during a chat with your kids or spouse. But it is not just ruining relationships and causing disconnection, it’s also creating havoc with your own levels of concentration and communication.
The term was coined in May 2012 by linguists invited by Australia’s Macquarie Dictionary and the McCann advertising agency to discuss a phenomenon common in the times of smartphone usage. Between then and now, phubbing has become notoriously real, snatching away our ability to be present.
A ‘stop phubbing’ campaign that was launched soon after, failed to make an impact.
“Phubbing is like opium of the people now,” says Dr Kersi Chavda, Consultant Psychiatrist, Hinduja National Hospital, Mumbai. Why do we constantly scroll through our phones instead of talking to colleagues, friends and family? Many of us phub without even knowing it is both impolite and harmful. A 2016 study published in the Journal of Applied Social Psychology reported that 17% of mobile users in the US phub others at least four times a day and 32% felt they were being phubbed twice or thrice a day. A 2018 Indian study, published in the Journal of Family and Community Medicine , found that the prevalence of phubbing was 49.3%. The reasons, it said, were internet and smartphone addiction, the fear of missing out, and the lack of self-control.
Dr Rahul Bagle, a psychiatrist with Columbia Asia Hospital, Pune, talks about phubbing ruining the very core of belongingness, meaningful existence, self-esteem and control. “It is a sad situation that we are constantly checking our phones for updates and notifications at the cost of our inter-personal relationships. We are stalling conversations, losing productive work hours, getting lower marital satisfaction and slipping into depression,” he says. Inter-personal communication means eye contact and complete concentration on the conversation.
Chavda says phubbing becomes a vicious cycle, because people who are phubbed may get more aggressive taking out their own phones, in order to fill the void. While unlearning a behaviour is not easy, the first step is to acknowledge that a number of us do it and to understand the reason why.
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