On my way from Delhi to Kolkata recently, I found myself with a senior railway official as my co-passenger in the cabin. From the very beginning it was clear he was a Very Important Person, as attendants in the train came in every five minutes to make sure his journey was a comfortable one.
As the train chugged off we started with a formal introduction and he confirmed he was the chief of a particular zone of the Indian Railways. He was a tall man in a white kurta, carrying a William Dalrymple in his right hand. And with his left hand he often tended his carefully crafted French-cut beard.
I was quietly trying to understand the nature of the violence the 19th century Indian women faced, through Ashis Nandy’s essay on Sati. After the mandatory stranger-turns-familiar overtures, he initiated a structured conversation, as I was bit hesitant to do so (even though I had a valid ticket).
Actually, it was his interest in what I was reading that led us to a kind of discussion that can be comfortably bestowed the title, ‘Condition of Women in India: A Historical Overview.’
Compated to our train, we travelled much faster and traversed through ages — from the status of women in the Vedic age to the rights of the working women of our time. Gradually our discussion moved into gender-discrimination at workplaces.
My co-passenger quickly made the point that nowadays employing women in positions where there is direct or frequent contact with them is fraught with risks for men. And he candidly admitted he preferred men as staff-members of his office. The reason was not his patriarchal bias, rather a sense of insecurity. Without being judgmental, he cited certain recent incidents where the high and the mighty allegedly got accused of sexual misconduct. He argued that it did not matter whether the allegation was true or false. Even if one is subsequently absolved of the crime, his reputation would be in tatters forever.
His point was not baseless, and what he actually wanted to draw attention to was the nature of man-woman relations at the workplace. But what set me thinking was the larger issue of inter-gender relationships, especially at workplaces, or in a broader sense, in the public sphere. Will all those recent reports of harassment (especially those that are sexual in nature) of women at workplaces end up subjecting women to even further discrimination?
I am not into the nitty-gritty of any particular case, individual or incident. But what I am afraid of is the situation where more and more men feel it is ‘safe’ not to employ a woman in the office. Workplaces would be reduced into virtual minefields. Colleagues would turn into potential victims or perpetrators or blackmailers.
There are people, like my co-passenger, who strongly believe in equal rights for women in every sphere of life, but they involuntarily end up discriminating against women in order to safeguard their ‘reputation’. An allegation, irrespective of its merit, can ruin the honour and reputation of a man. And the fear of this could also deny many deserving women their rights.
This was about inter-gender relationships. Now, what about intra-gender relationships? If we take a step ahead and look into the future, things would appear perennially perplexing. How will relations among men and women change at a time when homosexual relationships and same-sex marriages become a part of the matrix of social conformity? Will it then involve the same amount of risk to employ a man in an office as it is now for some to employ a woman? Will intra-gender and inter-gender relations get redefined only on the lines of potential prey and predator relationships?
It is difficult to answer these questions conclusively. But philosophically speaking, at the heart of the conundrum lies the unmitigated level of mistrust in human relationships. Be it private realm or public sphere, every relationship is suspect, therefore relationships are increasingly becoming ‘unsafe’. And we are ending up, voluntarily or involuntarily, reiterating our biases and prejudices.
By the way, the train had reached the destination, though one hour late. So, it was time to sign off.
hazra.nirupam@gmail.com
