Next time you enter the lift, look out for these guys

October 29, 2011 11:17 pm | Updated August 01, 2016 06:48 pm IST

Life is an elevating experience. Literally so, given the number of times we board and exit the lift in a day. Have you ever taken a look and tried to analyse the kind of people who get into the lift and share that space with you? Broadly, they fall into these categories.

The tough guy : He presses both the up and down buttons with full force as if he has an age-old enmity with it. He is impatient and views the others waiting for the lift with suspicion.

Touch-me-not : This chap who is already in the lift looks at others entering it with a sense of domination and authority, as if the entire facility belongs to him. He does not believe in eye or body contact, come what may.

Ignoramus : This person, upon seeing that somebody is walking towards the lift, tries his hand at all the buttons except the one which is meant to keep the door open.

Anxiety man : Upon entering the lift, he looks all nervous, as if he will get trapped inside. He reviews emergency procedures, checks the total capacity of the lift, counts the passengers to check if more people have got into it.

Entry level : This person will always prefer to stand at the edge of the lift very close to the door and ignores advice to stand back a little. He feels that he is entitled to the number one position.

The mobile guy : He continues to talk loudly on the phone, constantly telling the person at the other end that he is inside a lift and therefore signals are weak. Needs a crash course in cellphone manners.

The ‘Hot' guy : He switches on the fan the moment he enters the lift.

The Olympian : This person does not wait for others to come out of the lift and zooms inside as if in a race.

The loner : This guy does not enter the lift if he is alone. He waits for company so that if the lift is stuck, he will have somebody to talk to.

The lift in the movies : Lifts are huge. Like in Kamal Haasan's Ek Duje ke liye or Salman Khan's Wanted . They get stuck. Songs are optional, depending on the director's vision.

(The writer's email id is: philip 1957@gmail.com)

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