When you ask the founders of The Banyan, Vandana Gopikumar and Vaishnavi Jayakumar, about their experience in the past 25 years, they tell you the story of a woman — let’s call her Kajal.
“When we found Kajal, she was six years old. Her mother had bipolar disorder, and was homeless, so they would sleep outside Ethiraj College (in Chennai). It seemed as though the police had hit her mother many times for squatting,” says 47-year old Vandana. Vandana and Vaishnavi rescued her in 1995, and brought her into their home. Eighteen years later, Kajal not only did her masters in History at the very Ethiraj College for Women, but also topped her subject. Today, she works as a research assistant with The Banyan.
Kajal’s story is sort of a life lesson for them. “She taught us that there are two ways you can live your life. Either be bogged down by how unfair your life is, or remember the people who loved you. Of all the things life had dealt her with, she chooses to remember how her mother took care of her and shielded her, despite dealing with mental illness and poverty,” says Vandana.
Chin up
Beating the cynicism that comes with having to work around a system that never seems to improve, is not easy. “People we try to help — the homeless who are mentally ill — are stuck in a nexus of poverty. Different governments have come and gone, but they are still in the same vicious cycle,” rues Vandana, adding, “More than that, what can be frustrating is looking around and seeing people who just don’t care about these issues as long as it does not affect them, as long as their daily routines are not disturbed.”
Two years ago, when Vandana was speaking to a homeless woman, she was struck by the expression on her face. “The fear in her eyes reminded me of the woman who inspired us to start The Banyan in the first place. It was that very look,” she recalls.
And yet, when they are working with their residents, they find hope again. Says Vandana, “Let me make this clear — I’m not romanticising this in any way… But it is true that when I am with my residents, I feel most at home, because I know they will never judge me, nor I them. It’s when I am my truest self.” Says 46-year-old Vaishnavi, “I have learnt that families need not always be the ones you are born with, they can also be created. And they last just as long,” she says.
No judging
When they started out, like most people in their 20s, both Vandana and Vaishnavi had a black-and-white view of the world. “Looking at so many mentally-ill people being abandoned or neglected and left to wander by their families used to make me so mad,” says Vandana. There was always the chance that once their clients left them they may end up in the same place they started. “But such is the nature of our work. I have learnt how to cope with failure and death, and I have learnt to live with imperfections,” says Vaishnavi.
Vandana now realises why she needs to tone down the part of her that jumps to judgements. “I know how difficult it is to balance taking care of a mentally-ill person and at the same time providing for other members of your family as well. Nobody can be endlessly giving, nor do I claim to be full of virtues. We all have our flaws,” she says.
That said, it was their very naivete that helped them start The Banyan in the first place. “It was because we were rosy-eyed about life that we thought we could make a difference. If we had known how widespread the problem is, and how big the challenges we were to face, we would have given up before starting,” she laughs.
Life for Vandana is divided between connecting lost mentally-ill people with their homes in rural areas, fundraisers and occasional social gatherings in metro cities. “ It’s weird changing the frame of your mind from one to another. But it has to be done. I also get critical and start to over-analyse things. That’s something my family has learnt to deal with,” she laughs.
