A million phone calls: Mr. Mathrubootham has no peace of mind

Excuse me, Madam/ Sir, five minutes peace of mind is not there since Pandemic

May 02, 2020 04:26 pm | Updated May 03, 2020 02:56 pm IST

Respected Madam/ Sir,

First of all just want to check if everything is ok with you or no? Corona means everybody is tension party. Neighbour tension. Friends tension. Wife tension. Son tension o tension.

One second please, Mrs. Mathrubootham is calling for something.

Sorry. Brinjal in the fridge has done samadhi. And Mrs. Mathrubootham wanted to put one shouting to me because apparently she told me one million times cook brinjal immediately, cook brinjal immediately, and I said, no no, not today maybe tomorrow no no brinjal please, is this house or central jail canteen. She has put full shouting. I have come back.

Ok hello Madam/ Sir, I was going to tell you one Corona story that happened two or three days back. So whether you know Dr. Shankaramenon is new president of Residents’Association? Ok he is president. So for one month he is acting as if...

One second please, phone call has come.

Excuse me, Madam/ Sir, five minutes peace of mind is not there since Pandemic. Phone is ringing like temple bell in Guruvayoor. Ding ding ding ding ding ding. Just now Mohammed Usman is calling to check if Netflix is working in the house. Stupidly wasted my 10 minutes. After I checked, he is saying no need Mathrubootham wifi router switch was off by mistake, everything is ok. I said, “Usman what is on top of your neck? Brain or cabbage?”

What I was saying? Correct. Dr. Shankaramenon story. So after Corona and all has come, he is acting as if Residents’ Association is North Korea and he himself is one periya Kim. Plus, he is having MBBS also. Unbearable means unbearable. Morning to evening Kimkaramenon is putting notice on the wall, putting messages in WhatsApp group, and all. Rules means non-stop rules. Two metres. No touching. No dancing. No watering plants. No this, no that.

Excuse me, Mrs. Mathrubootham is calling again like tuberculosis is calling lungs for friendly meeting.

Madam/ Sir, brinjal gone bad my problem. Water heater not working my problem. Who used metal spoon in nonstick pan also my problem. Everything in this house is my problem. So many problems this is house or entrance exam? Nonsense.

Madam/ Sir, so I am telling you about Kimkaramenon. So this chicanery fellow, this blackguard, this thorough rapscallion is then secretly putting phone call and saying Mr. Mathrubootham, I have one plan. I said your highness, what is your command. He said what nonsense you are talking. President of Association means I have to be professional no? Personally, what rules are there? Nothing. In life you must never mix personal and professional matters. Mathrubootham, you want to come to my house secretly and play rummy?

Madam/ Sir, can you believe the hypocritical behaviour of this fellow? Whether in the whole world any other President is there who is behaving in such a stupid manner? I took the phone and said, “Dr. Shankaramenon listen carefully, no one in this world can tell Mr. Mathrubootham what to do and what to not do and how to do and...


Madam/ Sir, you please go home. You please go. Five minutes also I cannot get peace in this house. Fed up. Totally fed up.

No time for exasperation also,

J. Mathrubootham

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