Exam stress: ‘Even parents need counselling’

February 21, 2016 08:01 am | Updated December 04, 2021 10:54 pm IST - Bengaluru:

It’s not just students but even parents who need counselling to deal with exam stress and high blood pressure, say several psychologists and counsellors.

Counsellor Ali Khwaja said that stressed out parents account for 20 to 30 percent of the cases he deals with during exam season. Parents have unrealistic expectations of their children and this has to be addressed holistically, he said.

One of the more ‘extreme cases’ he dealt with recently involved parents who had spent lakhs on their child’s coaching classes. “They had set their mind on the child getting into IIT. We counselled them and the child and showed them alternatives," he said.

Another student counsellor, Shivananda Nayak, says that he often finds a parent obsessing about the amount of time the child spends studying. “Some children may not be able to sit and focus at a stretch. Expecting them to do so will add to their stress," he said.

A majority of the parents of children, who are appearing for board exams, ask the young ones to cut off extra-curricular activities, which can create conflict between the child and the parent.

Lavanya Devdas, a counsellor at Christ Junior College, said that the situation sometimes gets so drastic that the parents face an ‘existential crisis’.

“They tend to think of all the sacrifices that they have made, which may include the money they spent or the time they took off from work to ensure that their child makes the cut," said Ms. Devdas, adding that she often finds that parents tend to push a child to do well in a subject or a field in which the child may not have an aptitude for.

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