Good Grief

Looking for a bridge over troubled water? Krithvi Shyam, our young psychologist, addresses your worst anxieties.

August 21, 2013 04:25 pm | Updated 04:25 pm IST - CHENNAI

I am a 22-year-old B.E. graduate and my problem is that I have not got a job. My score is 50 per cent. I did not score very high in my Std X and XII too. My father always compares me with guys in my neighbourhood who are well settled. I think I’m a big loser in life as neither my friends nor my family respect me. I don’t have any friends and I have also contemplated suicide. I don’t have any hope in future. I have only been rejected at all the interviews I have attended so far. Everyone thinks I’m useless and that I do not have any talent. Please give me some advice on how to identify my talent and what I could do to better myself.

Down and out

Yuck, being compared to other people is the worst, so you have my sympathies. However, you are very young and should not give up so soon! You probably do have many talents; the only issue is you may not have had a chance to explore them. Take some time to understand yourself, your strengths and your weaknesses. Since you feel you have scored low marks, you need to build other skills to make up for this. This doesn’t mean you start signing up for every certificate course in the country.

Ask yourself these questions: what sort of jobs am I applying for, and are they jobs which I think I can do well in, or are they capitalising on my weaknesses rather than my strengths? Are there jobs in industries I am interested in but haven’t tried applying to before that I could try for now? What sorts of skills are valued at these jobs and how can I acquire them (Eg: classes to improve spoken English, communication skills or the use of specific software)? Is there anything I can do right now (volunteer work or enrolling in a course related to my career interests) that will show future employers that, while I was looking for a job, I spent my time wisely?

You can also try speaking to alumni from your college and the placement cell coordinators to find out what sort of jobs people with CVs similar to yours had got, and look for such opportunities for yourself. You can tell your father that you are trying your best to find a new job, and would like his support in doing so. Maybe he can help you identify strengths you might not have recognised yourself. There are no situations that can justify suicide. Yes, it’s hard to face an uncertain future, but these are issues that just take time to get resolved, so make perseverance and a positive attitude your best friends and you will eventually succeed.

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