What is your idea of happiness?
Late-night tram rides in Calcutta and having a savings account. Having a savings account is of great cultural significance in our race, no matter how many stocks or mutual funds you may have. For a Delhi-walla, happiness is an investment in a property in Greater Noida.
What is your greatest fear?
Shooting pains through the left arm, three in the morning. Most men in eastern India die holding a bottle of Gelusil, from an attack that comes in the disguise of gas and indigestion, after a night of binging on mustard fish, Old Monk rum and a packet of cigarettes. It is that fear that made me let go of the latter two obsessions.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Catherine the Great. She was vulnerable yet firm and at the same time pragmatic. I like her loose morals, her inherent pragmatism, her ability to let go when things went out of control. Another historical figure that I identify with is the first Indian that was sent to Europe - an unnamed and undoubtedly lonely rhinoceros that was sent to the pope, but died in St Helena en route and was later immortalised in a print made by Albrecht Dürer.
Which living person do you most admire?
Digital Dutta. Like most Bengali men of a certain generation, Digital actually lives in his head, although he has an address in North Calcutta. In his head he can build entire cities, navigate through the Andes, solve the global fiscal deficit, discover the source of the Congo, manufacture stem cells that would cure Alzheimer's, solve the Riemann hypothesis and shed tears listening to Verdi's Il trovatore.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
My levity and lack of analytical skills. Recently a tarot-card reading by a friend told me that it is my frivolity that is stopping me from reaching higher levels. I should become a little more sombre and bring more sobriety in my work, a bit like writers of epic novels.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Self-righteousness and posturing. I also hate the newfound sanguinity among the north Indian m iddle-class, this self-perpetuating knowledge of being better than others. I also hate false self-confidence and too much optimism. I also wish people would not be so uncritical to received wisdom.
What is your greatest extravagance?
After twenty years of trying them out in different airports, I finally bought a Mont Blanc fountain pen in 2002. Recently my wife bought me a chairman Mao jacket by Rajesh Pratap Singh that cost my father's one-month salary before he retired. Also I desire travelling by business class but no one has offered me - they don't think I am old enough, and I can't afford it.
What is your favourite journey?
Delhi to Calcutta by Rajdhani Express. It is like a journey through various chapters in one's life. There is an interior aspect to it (as in memories of childhood), an external aspect (the landscape changing from dry, arid UP to green Bengal and Bihar) and a third entertaining aspect to it, reading complete books while travelling.
Who is your favourite painter?
Rothko.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
The idea of the genius and the western obsession with the individual genius. The number of school for gifted children in America makes one wonder what kind of children go to regular schools. Many of my Indian friends in America send their kids to these institutions for gifted children. I would have killed my parents if they'd done that to me.
What do you dislike most about your appearance?
My cylindrical Bengali torso which increasingly is becoming conical, with my head bigger than my body, a bit like a wine-bottle stopper. My wife, the other day, told me that I am looking foreshortened.
Which living person do you most despise?
Rajkamal Gupta, the national historian who is politically centrist and a rock star among the new Indian middle-class. He writes for the class that laments about their socialist Nehruvian past, takes pride in their secular fabric, and generally feels very happy being part of India Shining. He is like the feel-good doctor we had at the university, and whether you had an impending cerebral attack or deep suicidal tendencies, Dr Marchmont would always prescribe a Lemsip followed by rest.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Appropriate.
What is your greatest regret?
Not continuing with biochemistry and becoming a biologist.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Bengali detective stories.
When and where were you happiest?
Afternoons, home, sofa.
What is your present state of mind?
Bleak.
How would you like to die?
A quick pain through the left hand, not realising that I am dead till about three minutes after.
What is your favourite motto?
Hunooz Dilli door ast.
Sarnath Banerjee is a graphic novelist, artist, and filmmaker. He studied image and communication at Goldsmiths College, University of London. His first work, Corridor (2004), was widely marketed as India's first graphic novel. This was followed by The Barn Owl's Wondrous Capers and The Harappa Files.
