Mastizaade: Would you call this a film?

January 29, 2016 04:25 pm | Updated September 23, 2016 04:06 am IST

A still from the movie.

A still from the movie.

A few weeks ago after watching the promos of the two much hyped comedies I had updated my Facebook status with: “Getting horribly confused between Kya Kool Hain Hain Hum 3 and Mastizaade. Which is what?” Now, having watched Mastizaade a week after Kya Kool Hain Hum 3, I must confess that I am still unable to tell where last week’s film ended and this week’s began. The déjà vu has been frightening, right down to Tusshar Kapoor in the lead, Milap Zaveri wielding the pen (also occupying the director’s chair in Mastizaade), Thailand for location and a lot more.

Lest you want to know how Mastizaade is, well here’s a quick gist of it: Tusshar and Vir make ad films for products like Manforce condoms, the tagline for which is ‘ Karan Arjun kabhi nahin aayenge ‘(Karan Arjun shall never be born), then there are twin Sunnys—Laila and Lily Lele—who run a sex de-addiction clinic. There’s more, an Alcoholic Anonymous group where women suck lollypops, very tantalisingly. Then there’s a “blouseful” of a bank manager called Titli Boobna, who constantly puns on opening and closing of an account. The pun on giving and taking runs through the film is like a leit motif. A mandatory gay track leads on to a donkey and horse track. Double entendres keep pouring in. There is inventive wordplay like “no mangalsutra, only Kamasutra”. Bananas, rockets, guns and joysticks touch a metaphoric peak and acquire a new meaningful existence. Moans, groans, pokes and farts fill in whatever is left of the run time. In other words the infantilization of the viewers is complete. Only question left to ask after two hours: would you call this a film?

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