There are just some things I just hate to do. Having a bath at 6 a.m. before catching the school bus. Eating eggplant. And having to speak, sing or dance in front of an audience. While I have managed to avoid 1 and 2, number 3 is hard to get out of.
When I'm in front of a group of people I get self conscious. My palms get sweaty. My lips and limbs refuse to move. I end up looking like a ring tailed lemur caught in the headlights.
When we have class assemblies or presentations, I escape to the last row, and stand as still as a lamp post hoping that no one will notice me. If a teacher’s beady eyes happen to fall on me, I immediately wave my arms about and make shapes with my mouth, and hope that she thinks I’m singing and dancing with the rest of the class.
Every year, my school puts up a massive musical production. It’s really fancy — lights, live music, dancing, acting, singing. It’s kind of cool, unless you’re me. Then it kind of sucks.
Last year, I got roped into wearing a wig and a hat and dancing to a song with 30 other kids. My parents kept complaining they didn’t know which one I was because of the costume. I told them I WASN’T the one not dancing in the last row trying to escape. But I was.
In full swing
Anyway, all my friends were so excited about this year’s auditions. They had been rehearsing poems to recite and songs to sing. Some of the kids take it really seriously. When I saw N from grade 4 crying hysterically in the corridor, I went to ask her what was wrong. She said she was getting into the mood of her character and that I was ruining her groove. Unless she thinks we’re doing Harry Potter and she’s going to play Moaning Myrtle, I think she was way too melodramatic.
Then, I saw her crying again a little while later and went up to her and said “Excellent acting N” and she called me an idiot and said she was crying because she didn’t get selected. Actors!
Anyway, I steered clear of the auditions, till I heard that anyone who didn’t have anything to do would get put into the group dances. Not again! Apparently they don’t want kids to feel left out. I’m kind of happy to be left out of things. Why don’t teachers get that?
So, I decided to save myself and auditioned for the media team. I figured I’d get interviewed on the radio and become famous. I went for the first media team meeting today and V Sir said we had to write a 30 page report on saving the environment. I pointed out we were doing the exact opposite by using all that paper for crummy reports. He didn’t agree. Do you think it’s too late to see if they still have any singing tree roles left?
