Oscar
In the early 1980s, students at Regional Engineering College, Tiruchi, were greatly motivated to go abroad for advanced studies. Except for those studying architecture, everyone knew how to go about getting admission in universities abroad. Bachelor of Architecture was introduced at REC in the early 1980s and there were not many seniors who could offer tips. As I belonged to the first B. Arch batch, I was among the most disadvantaged. But, as I was itching for a chance to study and work in America, it was easy to overcome the handicap. From my second year at REC, I began preparing for everything that was counted as a prerequisite for admission to an American University. Ponni, one year junior to me, was also focussed on the same goal. In such an academically-charged environment, there was no room for romance.
Ponni
He went on to complete a specialisation in urban design at the University of Oklahoma; I followed suit by completing a master's in general architecture with emphasis on interior design at Cornell. We followed it up with specialised courses at Harvard.
Oscar
Both of us worked in New York. But, driven by our professional goals, we rarely met. As we had similar artistic and aesthetic inclinations, we would meet at museums and art houses.
Ponni
Love and marriage were a natural outcome of being so similar in our approach to life and work. Both of us did not want to join the brain drain; we wanted to return to India.
Oscar
We only wanted to gain wider experience that would prove useful when we worked in India. Work is a key component of our relationship. We spend more time at work than at home.
Ponni
Commitment to work has been our strength and weakness. Oscar fell severely ill, because he did not bother about his diet. He got into the habit of skipping meals due to work or taking unhealthy food that was readily available.
Oscar
Many a time, I work in areas quite removed from civilization and with only a tea shop in the vicinity. Invariably, I would make do with whatever was available. After my illness, I have begun stocking up on healthy food.
Ponni
The intensity of a relationship is discovered in a crisis. During Oscar's illness, I ran the company alone. While my parents took care of our son and helped in other ways, nobody could fill the emotional void. That episode brought us closer. I look back on it as a blessing in disguise.
