After years of complaining by some men that women have taken away what was rightfully theirs (beer, sports, loud belching, unshaved legs and hands), Haruki Murakami comes to their rescue by taking up what was traditionally a woman’s specialisation: an agony aunt. Or in this case, agony uncle. The famously reclusive writer will offer advice on everyday difficulties.
While the majority of ‘Harukists’ (his fans) are pleased by this — what’s not to like about a wise, old man meting out advice — disillusioned fans and just non-fans are not quite as chuffed. Which is a shame. Murakami echoes all the mundane, absurd and angsty thoughts that we’re probably too ashamed or embarrassed to say out loud. And imagine the range of answers that the cat-loving, jazz connoisseur can come up with.
I put together questions and answers by borrowing some of his memorable quotes. Q: As someone who is expecting a baby, why am I expected to share baby-bump photos on Instagram and Facebook? The baby was conceived due to the efforts of me and my husband. So why should everyone else be privy to it? – Pissed off preggers A: Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Q: I think Kanye West is the superior rapper while my thick-skulled boyfriend prefers Jay-Z. This has been the cause of many fights between us (we only agree on Chris Brown being a giant knucklehead). What do we do? – Troubled teen A: Listen up – there’s no war that will end all wars.
So leave it to Murakami to address what you should talk about when you go running, how to take care of lost cats (and why, perhaps), how to tackle A Wild Sheep Chase and why not to feel sorry for yourself, because “only a*****es do.”
