First it was basmati, then it was yoga. Foreigners are constantly stealing from us. World Yoga Day is our way of reclaiming our heritage, and in schools across the nation, it’s compulsory. It’s also very entertaining. On this day, every year, our TV screens are filled with images of Nitin Gadkari, Amit Shah and Arun Jaitley, trying to do the padmasana. This is a move in the right direction. If anyone needs to do some yoga, it’s them. They promised us a Government of heavyweights, and there is no doubt that they have delivered. Kilo for kilo, this has to be the single heaviest cabinet that India has ever had. Not that the others were pixies, but this group is clearly in a higher weight class. Whenever a minister goes missing for a few days, I worry that his colleagues may have eaten him. It’s always a relief when he reappears.
When they go to dine with Dalits, specially reinforced tables are brought in to bear the load of the buffet. Each and every one of them has, at some point, been photographed with a plate of puris. It’s an ongoing process. They’re expanding in front of our eyes. Personally, I blame the ghee. Ghee is rich. Ghee is wholesome. Ghee is a blessing. Ghee clarifies and purifies the soul. Our legendary wrestlers drank it like Coca Cola. But they also juggled enormous implements for several hours every day. In the absence of such activity, nothing adds substance to a man like ghee. This is what has happened to our cabinet.
Doing a bit of yoga, even if it requires assistants, is the least that they can do. It also reflects very positively on the fundamental integrity of
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