Is it all right to ignore the wickedness of a relative or a friend? Is it all right to keep from checking them? The answer to these questions is given by Vedanta Desika in his Subhasita Nivi. Desika says that not punishing a person simply because he is related to us or is a friend is just as bad as doing a wicked act ourselves. People who choose to look the other way when their loved ones sin, themselves fall in the category of wicked people, said M.K. Srinivasan in a discourse. But it is not easy to change the ways of the wicked. We may try our best to turn them towards the right path, but what happens if they refuse to give up their evil ways?
Desika has an answer to this too. He says that if efforts to get them to change fail, then it is best to keep away from them. There are people who grab the wealth of others and abuse others with venomous words. Having uttered vile words, they then pretend that they are not guilty of such utterances. “Did I ever say such things?” they ask. Such two-tongued people are as dangerous as snakes that have a forked tongue. Such people must be shunned.
A person may be born in a good family; he may be an intelligent person. He may bathe in holy rivers. Yet, if he is ill behaved, then nobody will praise him. It is foolish to think that even if one sins, one can atone for it later. Instead of thinking of possible atonements, it is best to avoid sinning altogether. One should not be deceitful, like a stork that silently awaits its prey on the banks of a river. It does not move. But when a fish comes near it, it grabs it immediately.
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There are people whose behaviour is like the stork’s. They give the impression that they do not desire anything, but if you get close to them, they deprive you of your possessions.