Lights, camera, auction!

Here is a wish list of pre-loved items, from Kangana Ranaut’s wooden horse to Ranbir Kapoor’s towel

SREEJITH R KUMAR

Steve Jobs’ brown suede Birkenstock sandals — the same ones he wore while wandering about his parents’ Los Altos home in the mid-1970s — have just been sold for about $220,000. According to the auction house, this is apparently the highest amount ever paid for a pair of used sandals.

‘The cork and jute foot-bed retains the imprint of Steve Jobs’ feet,’ gushed the auctioneers on their website while describing the said sandals, ‘which had been shaped after years of use.’

Imagine. It was as he paced about aimlessly in these sandals that Jobs dreamt of making little gadgets that people with low self-esteem would buy at exorbitant prices and hold in their hands to make themselves feel special. Not to mention how he could do buddy Wozniak out of his bonus when they were working for Atari.

I have no doubt the unnamed buyer is an NRI brother. I can see him now, piously carrying the sandals on his head, as he circumambulates his favourite deity, requisitioning him to grant another round of funding for his fifth consecutive failed start-up.

A couple of years ago, our very own Anushka Sharma came up with the idea of auctioning her pre-loved outfits, the ones she wore while expecting her child. I’m not sure how that went. But other than the transistor Aamir Khan used to cover his modesty in PK, which reportedly went for ₹1.5 crore, and a pinstriped suit that went for ₹4.3 crore, the market for pre-loved material has been woefully underexploited in our country.

Here is a wish list of pre-loved items I’d like to see in the market. Investors, make this happen, thank me later.

As always, let’s start with the film world: Shakti Kapoor’s iconic range of drawers (with extra long drawstring) from Raja Babu has to be number one on my list. Bid for the lot and insist they throw in his moustache from the same movie for free.

How can we forget Kangana Ranaut’s wooden horse from Manikarnika? It would make a great companion piece to the rubber crocodile Hrithik Roshan grappled with so valiantly in Mohenjo Daro. I would also bid for Himesh Reshammiya’s phenomenal collection of baseball caps (he has over 1,000, I’m told). They could be lined up on the top shelves while Jeetendra’s fleet of white shoes from the ’80s could occupy the bottom sections.

Let’s not leave out Ranbir Kapoor. I’d think his towel from Saawariya would be a worthy addition to any collection. Go for it, art-loving investors. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to bid for Salman Khan’s towel, too. The one he used to such great effect in the song ‘Jeene ke hain char din’ from Mujhse Shaadi Karogi. Have them dry-cleaned though.

I’d also like someone to bid for Hemaji’s old Kent Water Purifiers. And, while on the theme of water, Sunny Paaji’s hand-pump from Gadar, too. Side by side, they are bound to shoot up in value in the near future.

From the south, I’d like to see Chiranjeevi’s imaginary veena from Indra and Sivaji Ganesan’s eponymous mridangam from Miruthanga Chakravarthi in the market. Together. What a dream concert that would make.