Do you wonder why some people are always more popular, loved and get more recognition and opportunities? Have you always wanted to be like them?
If your answer is ‘yes’ then the question you need to ask yourself is — do you put enough thought into building stronger relationships with people around you?
Good relationships among people lead to mutual liking, respect and trust. Once a strong rapport is established, the person is far more likely to share information, buy your products/services/ideas, recommend you to others and so on.
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There’s more… Strong personal and professional relationships not only fetch innumerable opportunities, but also bring in a sense of belonging.
Most people pay the least amount of attention to building relationships. Poor interpersonal skills only pull a person down both personally and professionally.
Okay! Now that you know rapport-building is important, let’s look at a few basic things that you need to start implementing to see the magic happen.
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Remember the ‘Mean Girls?’ People hate them. Do not be nasty to people. Be respectful in all your dealings. Everybody loves a courteous colleague, subordinate, service provider or a neighbour!
A welcoming demeanour is never out of fashion. Be approachable and beckoning. Honey usually attracts more flies than vinegar, doesn’t it?
Mark your territory — being friendly doesn’t mean that you let people walk all over your space. Be assertive and define your boundaries for others… They will appreciate it!
Strike the arrow of humour — if you can make them laugh you have won their hearts. Light hearted humour that isn’t sadistic or offensive helps build strong relations. Tickle their funny bones and be on their list of favourites!
Tell-me-a-tale-people love talking about themselves — their needs, experiences, concerns, interests and so on. The more you hear them out sincerely, the stronger connect you will establish.
As Stephen Covey says, “seek first to understand, then to be understood.” Give people the gift of your attention and see the magic happening. Remember, a good, non-threatening listener will anytime win rapport more easily than a chatty individual.
Flash a smile — everybody loves happy faces. No one likes to be around a whiny, sulking and negative person. Greet people and smile. You’ll be surprised to discover how contagious it is!
Give sincere compliments — people are naturally drawn to those who give positive strokes. Catch people when they are doing the right things and convey the same with sincerity. However, don’t butter up people — you’ll only appear fake!
Dig for commonalities — it is scientifically proven that people enjoy the company of those with whom they have something in common. These could be common hobbies, beliefs, interests, etc… Aim at finding common ground and use it to make conversations ands small talk.
Are you a gossip monger? Though gossip will help you vent your frustration against a person temporarily; it usually makes you appear as a person who speaks behind people’s backs. Avoid gossiping, it will only drag you in negative light.
Lastly, the golden rule for rapport-building is accepting people as they are, sometimes with their eccentricities. The less you judge people the more they will feel comfortable around your presence!
The writer is Member of Founding Team and Senior Manager - Content Development at Work Better.