METRO PLUS

Who am I?

BABITA NARAYANAN

Have you ever delved into who the real you are? Begin the search now

No one can make you change
No one can stop you from
changing
No one really knows how
you must change
Not even you
Not until you start David Visott



We spend most of our lives living in a transparent, airtight bubble. A bubble built by us, largely helped by our family and the society. And most of us get used to this bubble and after a while we stop thinking about ourselves. We make it our comfort zone and we end up living there forever! But what we forget is that inside this bubble we die a slow death. Our individuality, our personality, our needs and desires die a slow death until we leave this earth without ever having our own identity. Living in this bubble, we remain a mere shadow of ourselves in the confines of our ’world’!

If we do a bit of a background study of our ‘bubblism’, we discover we are victims of circumstances. Our environment . Our society. Most of the times we even inherit our ‘bubbles’ and we think this is our birthright. A legacy that we think is our responsibility. Later on, in our adulthood we become victims of ourselves, powerless and voiceless, unable to make any changes.

Take a minute to ponder.

Who am I?

What is my role in my own life?

Do I have an identity?

So, who are you? Its time you decide! Its time you find out.

It’s making this decision of going inward for an honest journey of yourself and your life .That’s the most difficult. But we cannot find the answers unless and until we do this. What do we need to do? First of all you must have this intense desire to find yourself and your identity.

By an identity I don’t mean being a rocket scientist or a famous Odissi dancer or an international motivational speaker. Do you have ‘your’ identity? For instance: my name is Babita and I am known as Babita-not courtesy my father/ husband/ family/ town. I recognise my needs and I balance my life to take care of my needs and emotions. I find time for myself, to pursue what I need, have meaningful hobbies (not because you had to choose one just because it was convenient), to have freedom to grow as an individual without fear, guilt or embarrassment.

How many times have you been introduced as Mrs Nair or Mrs Prakash? You have lost count. How many times have you been introduced as the “office accountant” or “part of the marketing team”? We gracefully accept it without questioning because that’s the norm of the day. From time immemorial it has been drilled into us not to show our emotions, to be one of the lot, not to be different, not to disobey. You try to question any of this, and then you are a rebel. And of course marriage or an academic course (fulfilling someone’s dream) or a job (that is oh so perfect for you) cured you and that is the beginning of your end! Sadly, we go from this world without ever having an identity.

How do I start?

With these thoughts:

I need to and must discover myself!

Who am I? Irrespective of the role I play in my life!

What are my needs, wants and desires? Big or small.

Do I feel for myself and myself alone without having to worry about others or what others think about me?

Let this be your mantra. Until my next column.

( This is the first of a three part series, the awakening, the discovering and reinventing.

The writer is an image consultant and can be contacted at >babita@persona24carats.com/ >www.persona24carats.com)



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