At an airport waiting to board an aircraft, I met an old acquaintance, who even as we shook hands said he was feeling guilty that he had not kept in touch and repented for having once been rude to me.
While, to his admission I merely assuaged his feelings, the two sentiments of guilt and repentance stayed with me.
Reading Viktor Frankl’s book The Doctor and the Soul cleared the confusion for me. Both guilt and repentance, Frankl says, are self-correcting processes.
Guilt tells the individual that the act causing the feeling is a result of acting against what he believes he values, and therefore heightens the need in one to be in alignment, feel congruent and experience his authenticity.
Repentance is realising that what I may have done has also violated some value system and urges the individual to quickly correct the wrong.
Thus guilt and repentance, reconfirms Frankl, are ways to self-correct, self-restore and not indulge in self-flagellation. However, for both guilt and repentance to be tools for progress, they must be viewed as merely wake-up calls requiring us to correct course and not as ammunition to beat ourselves with.
‘Conversations with self’, has been shifted to Friday Review’, where it will appear every fortnight.
