One of my recent interactions with a gentle, suave and confident neighbour who was presumed to be happily married by our joggers’ group made me rethink whether we women should demand wages for housework.
Last week, sitting till noon in the park, she sobbingly told me that her husband had asked her to leave home as it was his property. Every time he gets angry, she has to face this outburst, making her feel worthless.
“It is your house too, how can it be only his,” I asked.
“When I ask the same, he laughs and tells me to show documentary evidence of how I had helped him and what is my financial contribution in building the house. After 40 years of marriage and investment of time, energy, youth, love, care and what not, if one gets to hear this, it is shameful,” she said. “When men get old, they recapitulate how well their hard work had paid off, but what homemakers like me are to do? Though we too work day and night, it is never accounted for. After all, what is the proof?”
She told me how brilliant she was in studies and at work as a teacher. She had to leave the job to take care of her husband and children.
Perhaps, actor-turned-politician Kamal Haasan’s election promise of paying minimum wages to homemakers in Tamil Nadu, an idea which found support from Shashi Tharoor, author and MP, is a way out to recognise housework in monetary terms. However, opposing the idea, actor Kangana Ranaut too is right that not everything is a business.
But why should the government pay wages to homemakers as promised by Mr. Haasan? Shouldn’t there be a law to make men pay their wives regular emoluments unless they have a regular income source of their own. Women can be given the right to waive off the payment, if they so desire.
A rule or law is desired because otherwise, men will treat this as “pocket money” and pay on their whims and fancies.
We all highly undervalue a homemaker’s contribution and by merely forwarding some WhatsApp messages and tweets, we cannot make people know the worth of these women. Some concrete steps are required.
Even if a woman waives off the due amount as her own decision, she can do that with respect and honour and will have the proof of her financial contribution.
Everyone deserves the right to be treated fairly and with respect. The idea may give power and autonomy to women.
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