I was shocked to read the observations of the honourable Judges of the Supreme Court of India endorsing the views of actor Kushboo on the issue of pre-marital sex. I have been living in the U.S. for the last 35 years. I have seen the “emotional trauma” a child undergoes when the mother is unable to identify the father. Such a child has low self-esteem and its economic performance is poor when caught in the legal battles of paternity rights and rejections. The result: the child lives with rejection, rejecting himself or herself, building up anger towards the parents and is a boiling volcano that will erupt anytime. These children grow up with a variety of abnormalities — Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Learning Disability (LD) Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Bipolar Depression. We now have research proof that brain networks connect after birth till five years of age determining the behavioural pathways in the future in a child. All are the result of early childhood experiences.
In a morally chaotic world, India should set an example by promoting morality and integrity, not permissiveness in sexuality. All religions agree that life is a gift of God. Human beings are the only ones gifted with rationality to distinguish the right from wrong, express feelings, reflect and take the right decision. Animals do not have social responsibility. No schooling is needed for them.
Carnal pleasures are not the purpose of human relationship and marriage. The highest purpose of man-woman relationship is to effectively plan for raising good children in a socially acceptable structure and to have companionship in life and for social protection.
Encouraging sexual relationships with the co-living prior to marriage leads to what the western society is now regretting. The guy loses interest in the girl he has a relationship with, as another girl attracts his attention for whatever reason. The girl tries to save the relationship by getting pregnant. The guy walks out of the life of the child and the mother. The mother looks for another support and that man will not accept this child and this child will not accept the new guy. Anger builds up and this leads to emotional and physical abuse as well. The child grows up with insecurity and the mother loses interest in the child as a result of the failures and depression.
Leave alone the moral angle, think about the social chaos that will result in a highly populated country like India that does not provide much systemic or societal by way of counselling or treatment for people in such trauma. The crime scene will escalate, besides AIDS / HIV and other sexually transmitted illnesses. Level-headed people and organisations should therefore, get together to avert impending disasters that will result from such deviant social mores. Otherwise, our children will go astray. What an insult to India and all that it stands for! What an insult to the spiritual wealth that we share with the world.
(The writer is a paediatrician based in Texas, USA)
