‘Ten Commandments' that can ease the stress

May 14, 2012 09:27 am | Updated July 11, 2016 05:06 pm IST - MADURAI:

Prof.I.Selvamani Thinakaran, Senior Consultant Psychiatrist, Madurai.-

Prof.I.Selvamani Thinakaran, Senior Consultant Psychiatrist, Madurai.-

Senior consultant psychiatrist I. Selvamani Thinakaran at K.Pudur is very busy these days. She has narrated two specific cases of how children suffered due to parents' anxiety and expectations besides pressure from schools.

Case 1: A Plus Two boy who was an above average student in school faced enormous pressure from his father, a bank employee. Just a day before the results were declared, the boy committed suicide, subsequently parents underwent depression, came for counselling.

The boy scored 98 per cent in mathematics. A good student died because of high expectations and parents' anxiety, she noted.

Case 2: A father hit his son with belt, relatives brought the boy for consultation…and later on this student pursued animation course and is now well settled in Hyderabad.

He is still in touch with the psychiatrist who saved his life.

To avoid Plus Two result-related untoward incidents in homes on or after May 22, Prof. Selvamani Thinakaran appealed to the parents to follow the ‘Ten Commandments':

Accept the marks and proceed to the next step. Be friendly to your son or daughter whatever the marks may be, acceptance is important.

Don't demoralise the child.

Don't compare your child's marks with others and don't hurt the ego.

Give emotional support and take it easy.

Realise that Plus Two marks alone are not the deciding factor in life.

Find out which course he or she is interested, then go for admission.

Don't impose your interest and your ideas on children. It may boomerang.

Understand that marks do not indicate real intelligence. Your child must have self-confidence and inner drive.

Have a happy and positive environment at home during results and admission time. Mental health and physical health are equally important.

During the results time, don't send your child to relatives' homes to avoid any negative comments/ wrong advice. Consult your well-wishers and proceed confidently.

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