“I live in a constant fear of safety for my mother. She is like a kid, lost in the crowd. All her recent memories are gone and she lives in the past”, says Mallika Krishnan. Her mother is one of the estimated four million, affected by dementia in our country.
It is Alzheimers Day on September 21 and understanding the condition and providing support to the care giver are two vital aspects one must pay attention to, says Latha Joseph, administrator and national dementia trainer at Alzheimer’s and Related Disorder’s Society of India, Cochin. Joseph herself was a caregiver to her mother in law who had Alzheimers, and shares her difficult experience. “My mother- in-law thought her son (my husband) was her husband. She hated me being with him. I was in a state of dilemma, and I was hesitant to share it with anyone. My husband was also clueless how to deal to her”. But Joseph says once she got a better understanding of the disease, things improved somewhat.
It is demanding and tough caring for an Alzheimer’s patient and demands a lot from the caregivers. The patients demand constant attention and that can be draining, she says. “Without proper assistance, the care-givers feel helpless, and in extreme cases can slip into depression.”
Patients especially in their middle and advanced stages of Alzheimer’s tend to be stubborn as their thoughts are broken leaving them in a state of confusion. They are likely to get irritable as they are unable to communicate their needs. Words slip away from their memory.
Dr Rahul Padmanabhan, Medical director, Grandworld Elder Care says, “Unlike other diseases, in this case, the caregiver himself needs support. It can be from members of family or friends.” Sometimes the care-givers need medical help too and need a break. Other family members and dementia-care centres can provide some relief to care givers. Most importantly, says Dr. Padmanabhan, allow them to do things as much as they can. “If they are capable of dressing up themselves, let them do it. Respect their independence.”
Dealing with Alzheimers Disease is tough. Caregivers share a few useful tips that can help
- Obtain information about the patient from a family member, preferably a sibling. They can share details about the patient’s favourite food, person, hobby or place when they were young. This provides care-givers some help with their wards
- Avoid asking the patients if they remember something or some one constantly. This can upset them and makes them feel dejected.
- Always ensure the patient has an identification tag with his or her name, address and contact number
- Allow them to do things they are still capable of doing
- Interact with other caregivers. Sharing experiences lightens the burden
