Parents often complain that their children are disobedient or not motivated enough to be achievers, or that they are not honest.
But do parents wonder if they are in a way responsible for these traits of their children?
In a discourse, Suki Sivam elaborated on the role of parents in moulding the character of their children. There was a teenager who lived with his parents on a plantation. He looked forward to occasional visits to the town.
One day, his father asked the boy to drive him to the town, where he had a meeting.
The boy was supposed to buy groceries and also have the car serviced while his father attended the meeting. But the son, after having dropped his father, went off to see a film. His father waited for him for long; when the son finally turned up and said the mechanic had delayed him, his father said the boy was lying.
He had called up the mechanic, who had told him that the boy had left a long time ago.
The teenager then confessed that he had been to a film. His father said his son's lying was a reflection on him as a father. So as a punishment for bad parenting, he would walk the distance home.
From that day, the son never told a lie. Had the father chastised the boy, it might not have had the same effect.
Once a boy came home from school, crying. He told his mother that when his teacher had asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, he replied that he wanted to be a tonga driver.
The teacher had not been happy with the reply. The mother then brought a picture and showed it to the boy and said the boy could be a chariot driver like the one in the picture, if he tried.
The picture she showed him was a picture of Lord Krishna as charioteer, and the boy who wanted to be a tonga driver felt encouraged by his mother's words, and grew up to be a great philosopher.
Thus, it was a mother's good parenting that played a significant role in shaping her son's future and making him a spiritual leader. Parents must learn how to teach their children morals and values, without being harsh. They must lead by example.
