So apparently, I need to work on pushing my grades up in a few subjects. Okay, okay, I need to push my grades up in all my subjects, but there are some subjects that need a bigger push than others. And no, pushing my grades and subjects off the sides of a cliff into dark, angry waters is not an option. Believe me. I asked.
So, since the grown ups decided that Grade VI Maths, Physics and Chemistry were too hard for them to teach, they decided I needed a tutor. I’d just like to point out here that my super old parents who have white hair and what they keep calling ‘life experiences’ can’t manage chem and algebra, but I, an 11-year-old who isn’t allowed to have his own phone, am expected to be acing it? Does anyone else see the unfairness here?
Extra help
First of all, since we live so far away from civilisation, no one wanted to come and take classes for me! My joy was short-lived when K Sir, my math tutor from Grade IV called the parents up and asked how I was doing. Amma believes that it’s divine destiny or something, that he somehow sensed I needed help and that’s why he called. Like he’s some Jedi Math Whiz. Great. I just ruined Star Wars for myself. Anyway, it was decided that K Sir would come for ‘extra help’, ‘doubt clearing’ and ‘homework assistance’. AKA TUITION! Cue screaming.
Now, I don’t hate tuition. But I don’t love it either. I mean after seven hours in school, I don’t think anyone would want to come home and do more ‘sit in a chair, write and listen’. It’s like asking grown ups to come home after a long day at work and do more work. Okay, okay, I know our parents are always saying that they’re on a ‘work call’ and need to ‘check their email’, but is it fair I have to suffer too?
When I used this argument on my parents, do you know what they did? DO YOU? They organised my tuitions… FOR THE WEEKEND! What new form of torture was this? Are these people even my parents or are they evil alien parent doppelgängers conducting mind experiments on me?
If after school hours are for brain rest and relaxation, weekend hours are for TV, cricket, swimming and more TV. Not algebra, simple machines and the periodic table. As if a Sunday tuition wasn’t bad enough, they fixed it from 6 p.m. to 7 p.m.! That’s peak playground time. Who does that? Evil alien parent doppelgängers that’s who!
To make this entire situation even worse — if that were possible — the Pesky Brother, academic superstar that he is, gets to go down and play! Smiling, singing and SMUG!
Well, I took care of that smug smile thanks to an accident between my compass and his favourite football. Maybe geometry isn’t that useless after all.
Now, I’ve to go and find my real parents. They’ve got to be out there somewhere!
