The number of children in the various adoption agencies is much higher than the prospective parents, and yet there is a huge demand for children.
According to parents who have adopted children, the process of adoption was tedious and involved 2-3 years of waiting.
Parents of children who were adopted and couples keen on adopting got together to share their experiences. Parents felt the need for better pre-adoption and post-adoption services such as counselling, to understand and deal with the various challenges they would face. “About two decades ago when we adopted our daughter, we were clear that she would be informed that we are not her biological parents. Our parents had apprehensions too. But now she is doing engineering and we share a great relationship,” says Ranjani Jayaraman.
“We do not find it any different from having a biological child,” she adds.
One of the parents wanted to know whether there was a need to take the child into confidence.
Others agreed that it was necessary, as any relationship could not be built around the ‘fear of finding out.'
When he was around 13 years, Vishal Shankar got hold of his adoption papers and went through them behind closed doors in an attempt to find out who his biological parents are.
“My parents have said that they will try their best to find my biological parents. It doesn't matter much, but I am curious,” he says, joking about his attempt later when he tried calling up the adoption home to find more details.
His father S. Shankar says that the database of parents should not be concealed since the child has the right to know his parent.
For another parent Nirmala Chukka, initially, adoption was about making a difference to the life of a child. “But now I have realised that one should adopt only if one wants to become a parent and not as a gesture of service,” she says, all eager to adopt a child.