Why spanking should stop

Punishing is good, whereas beating is intolerable; there are both pros and cons.

March 07, 2015 10:48 pm | Updated 10:48 pm IST

It is believed that children are the face of god as they carry no prejudice or envy. They are just pure at heart. Yet it is shocking that children are often the victims of punishment by their parents and some of their teachers.

In a horrendous reflection of poor parenting habits in most cities, a survey has found that 62 per cent of the parents admit to spanking their children. The survey, which involved 1,700 parents in Mumbai, showed that a higher number of mothers hit their kids as compared to fathers. Of the respondents who said they spanked, 29 per cent were fathers and 61 per cent mothers. According to the survey, over 80 per cent of the parents who admitted to spanking their children were themselves beaten as kids.

 Smacking can spoil lives, and the experience can remain in the minds of children and affect them later in life. It could traumatise and psychologically scar the young and tender mind. In an instant, one could get estranged from family, friends, kith and kin, and long-term affairs can turn sour.

Beating children amounts to child abuse; there are other ways to mete out punishment. Mild spanking by parents is actually good sometimes. Parents often find the easy way out in scolding and beating kids, rather than making time to work on them and make them understand things.

Punishing and beating are two different things. Punishing is good, whereas beating is intolerable. There are pros and cons. But not all children are the same. Some by their very nature are calm and accept whatever we say. Some others will be arrogant and may really need punishment — though not harassment. Punishments should be within limits. A child should not get disturbed mentally and physically. We have to be really careful in dealing with them. In my view, children should be punished politely if they go on the wrong path.

Sadly, many parents pass on to children their inability to handle their own problems by punishing them. Whenever a parent or teacher punishes a child or pupil, it reflects a certain attitude and state of mind.

In my own childhood I got punished a few times by my parents and teachers, but in each instance it was meant to discipline me, to make me attentive in class or to study well. My regard for them remains. But today, beating children invariably reflects badly on parents and manifests lack of parenting skills or ability to promote in kids a sense of self-respect.

mdey76@gmail.com

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