Respected Sir/ Madam,
Tragedy, tragedy, nothing but tragedy. How are retired but still socially and economically productive persons such as myself supposed to live peaceful life if government will keep on interfering day and night?
Now I know 100% you are thinking: “Oho finally Mr. Mathrubootham is talking politics. All this nice gentleman, living peaceful life and all... full drama like Rajinikanth. Secretly full and full politics sir! Nobody you can trust these days, not even Mathrubootham.”
Mind your language, Mister/ Madam. Other newspapers will also publish letters. You think only you have printing press?
Three things I have zero interest in my life: cricket, politics and Facebook. You just look at Mrs. Mathrubootham in the evening when she is relaxing in the living room. Sitting with phone in her hand, looking with 100% concentration as if copy of Ramavataram or Guns of Navarone . I will say, “Kamalam, hello Kamalam, hello…” Any reaction? Nothing. Her body will be stone statue, only her thumb will be going up and down on the phone.
“Kamalam, hello. Kamalam, I am getting cardiac arrest. Kamalam, my eyes are bleeding. Kamalam, fridge is on fire. Kamalam, I had chicken biryani yesterday and then one Charminar with Kingfisher. Hello.” Nothing.
Then suddenly after 20 minutes she will say, “Mr. Mathrubootham, did you know Dr. Sankaramenon’s son-in-law has gone to Budapest?”
“Sorry Kamalam, but I have died of cardiac arrest,” I will say. “What nonsense you are talking old man, don't joke about such things and give people high expectations.”
Sir/ Madam, one day if you stop getting letters from me, please immediately contact Kamalam Mathrubootham on Facebook and leave message to check the house for my body. (For identification purposes, in her photo she is standing next to cardboard cutout of actor Madhavan.)
Politics is even worst than Facebook. At least people using Facebook will sit quietly. During my college days, my brother was big Communist type. Labour idhu , worker adhu , Marx idhu , revolution adhu . Once a week he gave study class at home to the full family. My father thought 100% he is going to become Naxalite. But then he got job in one construction company in Mumbai, and after two-three promotions he has become full and full liberalisation.
Third thing is cricket. Sir/ Madam, you are already publishing enough nonsense about cricket. If I also write, it means it will be like when corporation people come and put my bucket of garbage in their truck of garbage.
What was I originally talking about?
Oh yes. Government. Ok, fine, you want to put national anthem in theatre? You put it. You want me to stand. Ok I will stand. You want me to sit. Ok I will sit. Every five years you want me to create new identification card from some government office? Ok I will stand in line.
But why you are banning Vicks Action 500 extra?
Sir/ Madam, I have been a dedicated consumer of Vicks Action 500 extra since my youth days. If I went on the scooter in the rain and got headache? Vicks Action 500. If I tried to adjust TV antenna on the terrace and fell down onto the roof, and rolled off the tiles and fell onto the scooter? Vicks Action 500. If I have to travel on Alleppey-Bokaro express to go to Sambalpur after Diwali holidays? In advance I will have Vicks Action 500. Once I reach Sambalpur branch and start providing banking services to customers? Vicks Action 500.
And now government is saying no! No more! Something something combination, something something danger, something something overdose. Bloody fools. So many things in this country are giving people painful life. Pothole, tax, cricket, Facebook, inflation, pollution, Salman Khan and all. And you are banning the one item that will reduce this pain.
Sir/ Madam, you please ask the government what it wants from retired people such as myself. You want me to go up and down and up and down in cinema theatre like Kho Kho player, and then suffer lifelong joint pain? Or get some relief also?
Yours in consumer dissatisfaction,
J. Mathrubootham
