Why the recent Marriage Laws (Amendment) Bill may not make much difference to a majority of rural women.
Should women cheer now that the Union Cabinet has approved the Marriage Laws (Amendment) Bill 2010? If it becomes law, women will have the right to an equal share of property acquired after marriage and divorce will become easier. The additional ground of “irretrievable breakdown of marriage” has been added and there is a shorter waiting period when both parties want to end a marriage.
Most television talk shows have focused only on the urban, educated, middle class women. There is an assumption that divorce and partition of marital property affects only them. There are also crazy scenarios being created about a “divorce epidemic”.
Exercising rights
In fact, we have to ask whether such a change in law will make any difference to the majority of women, especially those living in villages. Most women do not know that under law they are granted many rights. Even if they do know — such as the right of daughters to inherit a share of their parents' property — they are forced or persuaded to sign away their right. A recent study by the Rural Development Institute (RDI) of women's land rights in Andhra Pradesh and Bihar noted that more than half the Hindu women surveyed had signed away their right to land they would have inherited.
Inheriting property or land is crucial for many women seeking some form of economic security. Yet, this is precisely where their lack of knowledge or ability to exercise the right forces them to continue living in abusive and violent marriages. To walk out of such a marriage means walking into destitution. But if they fight for their right and succeed in getting their share, they are ostracised by their own community. Nothing has changed the entrenched belief that a woman, once she leaves her natal home, has no right to anything there and that the dowry she carries with her is adequate compensation.
The other side of ignorance about rights is the absence of supportive structures to help women claim their right. According to the RDI study, 61 per cent of women said they had never gone to a revenue office and of these 99 per cent said this was because men handled such matters. Of course, it did not help that the majority of the lower level revenue officials were also men. A simple step like appointing more women to such posts might begin to make a difference.
Several studies have shown that women who have the ability to stand on their own feet are less likely to tolerate an abusive marriage. Of course, there are always exceptions to this rule as is evident from the searing essay written by the young poet and writer Meena Kandasamy, “I Singe The Body Electric” (http://www.outlookindia.com/ article.aspx?280179) where she speaks about the abuse she suffered within the first four months of getting married. Economic independence did not protect Meena from domestic violence but it gave her the courage to walk out.
Double-edged
What about women living in villages, in highly patriarchal societies, where the majority of women accept that beatings and abuse are part of what marriage is all about. In such societies, inheriting property can become a double-edged sword.
A fascinating study on the link between economic independence and domestic violence is by feminist scholar Prem Chowdhry for UNWomen (http://www.unwomensouthasia.org/ economic_security.html). She could not have picked a more appropriate state for such a study. Haryana has one of the lowest female sex ratios in the country. It has become known for the horrendous incidence of so-called “honour” killings where young men and women are murdered merely for marrying a person of their own choice. According to the National Family Health Survey-3, 27 per cent of married women in Haryana have seen physical, emotional and sexual violence and 46 per cent of women and 33 per cent of men felt that a husband beating a wife was justified in certain circumstances. In such a State, where girls are not allowed to be born, can women escape such violence if they assert their right to a share of property?
As in the States surveyed by RDI, in Haryana too women tend to sign away their right to parental property. But now this has begun to change. With the spread of urbanisation, property prices are hitting the roof. Girls are now demanding their share, often egged on by their in-laws. Of course, there is no guarantee that they will have control over the money if they manage to get it. But the study cites many instances where the situation of women, and even of their daughters, has changed dramatically once they have money or property in their own name.
Studies like the one by Prem Chowdhry and many others firmly establish the link between women's economic independence — either by way of property or an assured income — and a reduction in domestic violence. Even as laws are changed in the name of empowering women, we have to take the first steps — of informing women of their rights and creating the supportive structures that will guarantee that they can exercise these rights.
E-mail: sharma.kalpana@yahoo.com
Some men tend to force their rude behavior on the society.I know women in my
extended family,who earned some times more than their husbands,were forced to hand over their pay packets (signed cheques) direct to the husbands,who would squander it on alcohol and then browbeat them about being in possession of ancestral property.Most of the women have no human right to marry or not marry
or of happiness.
Women are treated as slaves,who have been handed over to a man´s family for food tickets,by the fathers so as to get rid of them,being unable to pay for their living or to deprive them of the ancestral property. Shame on the Indian system which kills its female babies even in womb. Further even in cities,a single women is being considered a free bird to be shooter
down by any body. India must provide social security to all its women and create a climate for 50% of its population where women can live without fear from their male counterparts.
There are laws favoring women from lower to higher courts, even before she began writing the article and still she believes nothing has changed. Even for this new law she is not confident that it will be useful to all Women. Your own link for UnWomen shows nothing found giving an idea about your shallow research. Now for some practical stuff: 498A-Jailing husband and everyone in his family without investigation, DVA- Prosecute husband if you don't like anything in him or his family, Dowry Act-A false list produced in court can put husbands family in trouble. The only thing needed was to extract property out of him and make his physical and mental life miserable. What else do you need?When will hunger fulfilled? What picture are you putting in front of the World about India when you have full freedom to write whatever you want to?
One of the biggest cause for this type of situation is illiteracy among women. And moreover influence of her mother and relatives to tackle the situation, who always gave wrong decision. There is so much liberty given to women that after marriage if that women complain of her in-laws not only law but people readily takes her side.
Reading all the chauvinistic comments posted here by 'educated' men, I am not really surprised why India consistently makes it to all the lists featuring the world's worst countries for women.
Half of ills including corruption can be addressed if women are aware of that they have to stand on their own feet. Women should stop leaning on males for economic survival. Why is there so much demand for private tutions? It is because women at house do not take time to read books of children. Reading is very important habit which can be cultivated at no cost. Reading would free women much quicker than laws.
Several comments by men show just how chauvinistic they are. Men obviously don't want the situation to change since it suits them. Laws can always be abused by people. That does not mean that they should not be enacted. To say that the fabric of society will disintegrate by women's empowerment is ridiculous. Misogynistic views of our society and societies around the world need to change. To say that the husband's hard-earned money cannot/should not be simply given away to the other half who has spent her time and effort in keeping his home and raising his kids (and perhaps giving up her career so that he can make his) is undermining her contribution to the marriage.
@ Sara - Very well said. A true statement. The suggestions/conditions of grooms parents are always adhered. However the request from a bride's parents are considered as interference with the married couple. Most of the comments show the biased nature of our society towards women. These laws are for the upliftment of women. Not even 1% of men are abused by these laws. Even educated professional women are suffering because of the society. Even women are made to believe that is correct. As rightly pointed out by the author "Awarness" is the key.
Regarding the "In most disputes it is wife's parents who are unnecessarily interfere to daughters matrimonial home" allegation in one of the above comments - I've seen read cases where the wife is almost murdered, and helped out of her matrimonial death trap by her parents, and then of course it becomes a police case or divorce case. Now, after their victim has escaped their grasp, the husband & family say the same quite as above - that "there is no big issue, but the wife's parents are interfering". No parent will want their daughter's married life broken provided it is a good one. Quotes as above invariably turn up in case of severe violence & unexpected escape of the wife. Saying that wife's parents are interfering is equivalent to a nabbed thief saying that the policemen are interfering in his work.
I agree with many people here that these laws are creating a deformed and biased society. If you believe in equality do not make such laws. In one hand we want to treat women equal and in other hand we are making laws favoring them and in a view that they are weak. They are now quite well educated, well placed and one can see women in quite higher positions or even in defence forces. Then why these type of laws? In any form of crime related laws, man and women should be equally treated. If we want to see India powerful or advanced or developed, the laws favoring castes, religion, gender must be removed. The laws must be formed irrespective of these aspects in order to have a reformed society.
This law will not help those whom it intends to help, and in all likelihood, lend itself to abuse like the current divorce laws. As for unmarried men like myself, I am going to be extra cautious in choosing a bride, and my initial instinct will be to distrust any girl. I thank the feminists of this world, like this author, in helping my find justifications for misogyny. The narrative behind articles like this, although it dresses itself in the language of 'human rights' is a Man vs. Woman narrative.
This is with reference to one of the commentator (bharat's) remarks... What a shame it is to say that men in india are again penalized by stupid gender biased laws in India and women are to be only sex mates. Infact they are so cunning to use these laws to their advantage and crux it further to belittle or humiliate the female partners. It is very untrue that men are not given choice in marriage. Its loathing to see when they demand material, possessions and inheritance from the bride's side duly before or after marriage and file for divorce for untrue and stupid reasons. Am not sure if the commentator has gone through or is really actually aware of the trauma that women undergo in Indian society. Not that men are equally justified by marriage and divorce and are the lone victims of an unsuccessful marriage. Equally both men and women suffer the same fate when it comes to divorce , but the consequences that women undergo or are forced to put up are upto no ones imagination.
The problem in India is the enormous diversity of every kind. Some sections of the population have reached parity with the global elite in terms of women's rights and indeed nearly every metric. While at the same time vast majority of population is effectively living in pre-modern times. We are tending toward making laws that increasingly biased in favour of women. What is truly needed is more awareness among *all* sections of people about the laws already on books. Or else we will continue to have increasing but still in great minority cases incidents of women harassing their husbands and in-laws in top layers of the society while at the same time among the masses our great 'traditions' of bride burning, dowry harassment, abandonment and so on continue unabated.
There is no doubt women are put through a lot of suffering and harassment and need legal support. The solution for misogyny is NOT misandry. I am a false 498a victim with my entire extended family in jail. Wife was caught committing adultery. Most legal systems presume innocence until proven guilty. The current law puts people in jail on the low legal barrier of a verbal allegation. With the current laws and proposed amendments, I and my family would spend the next several years trying to clear our names. Wife gets a quickie divorce, remarries, our baby is cut from me (the mother is the BEST parent, no matter what!) and gets a share of my property (she is filthy rich already but has transferred all her assets to relatives). Legislators should use a little common sense before blindly aping Western laws which have some fundamental cornerstones - they are gender-neutral, pre-nuptials are legal, both spouses are treated equitably in terms of property rights, alimony and child custody.
Folks,
The authors focus is on lack of awareness among women abotu laws that
can help them get out of abusive marriage. Why not stick to that when
commenting?
Mr Bharat and other men (who show their manliness only to women):
WHO has listed India as one of the countries with very poor healthcare
for women along with somalia, afganistan, pakistan. Indian women don't
get food to eat even when they are carrying their husbands child.
Doesn't it ashame you so called 'good innocent men' that other 'bad'
men are abusing other woman.Next time you stand before goddesses in
temples please don't say a prayer as obviously you don't respect
women.you are the most insecure man on earth who believes a woman has
to pay a price for being one. What is this nonsense about woman
watching soap operas..? if your wife is like that go confront her or
get a psychologist..don't waste an important platform to blow steam. I
live in USA married to a good Indian man but looking at men in
advanced country, most Indian men are selfish and cowards. This is the
reason India is still very backward in everything ironical as it has
the most hardworking women on earth
By nature women are vulnerable and prone to oppression and ill treatment . This has to change and women should be empowered and given equal status . Home maker , no doubt , puts all her efforts to maintain home and raise the children and men work hard and become the bread winner.Both men and women should recognize the other's roll in a family.This law should not be applied if the divorce is due to the fault of the women of a family . Always men are not at fault . There are women who are stubborn and incorrigible . What is the escape / safe guard for men in such cases ?
If India Govt claims that about 8000 women are getting killed for not meeting dowry demands of DANGEROUS husbands, and multitudes are facing VIOLENCE for not bringing money, what number is India Govt targeting to achieve every year by allowing women to take away the wealth of these DANGEROUS husbands through Marriage Law Amendment Bill? Search for "Raising a philosophical question on Marriage bill" and learn more.
The writer seems to be very confused - starts with new Law amendment
and then going all over the places to sex ratio, empowerment, economic
independence etc..
Giving "husband's" property to woman is not the solution but creation
of a new set of problems.
Husbands build property for their entire family - parents, children,
siblings (which include WOMEN as well) - but this law wants to take
away all that and give away to wife, thereby, denying rights to all
others just to favor wife!!
Women do no want to "earn" property for themselves but want to
"extort" away from men!
The article itself talks about rural/urban divide - but still favors a
law cutting across all sections of society.
Why not have pre-nuptial agreements instead of squabbling on property
at a later date - so, better to make provisions for pre-nups, that way
both the parties will have incentive to keep the marriage working,
else, they know how much they make/loose from failed marriage!
>> In most disputes it is wive's parents who are
>> unnecessarily interfere to daughters matrimonial
>> home and cross their limit.
Sorry, I've seen real cases where the wife is almost murdered &
her parents & friends help & support her to escape from her matrimonial death-trap and file a complaint or divorce, and now, after the victim (wife) has escaped their trap, the husband & family come to the police-station/court & act as if they are lambs and only the wife's parents have unnecessarily interfered.
In EVERY case where the husband & co are caught red-handed by the girl's family, they always act as if the girl's parents are exaggerating & interfering. No parent will want their daughter's married life broken _if_ it was a good one. So any complaints about wife's parents interfering is equivalent to a complaint by a thief saying that the police are interfering when he is doing his business.
Hi, I briefly wanted to discuss about the backdrop and consequences of the skewed perspective of the government: a) many pro women legislations are short sighted and do not sufficiently address current state. Hence the itch for more laws. b) There are many cases of abuse of law by women and their families to end up living spineless lives c) These laws only promote the notion that women are the weaker sex when they should be constitutionally equal to men. d) We run the risk of destroying the whole institution of marriage with such obtuse perspectives. We can do better with mandatory orientation programs for the newly weds (like we have for jobs) and mandatory counseling before reaching courts, legally providing equal rights to both spouses (this betters dignity of women as an equal and also provides sufficient rights and ownership to both), detailing the law by providing a framework for share in property based on the economic condition of the spouse.
Many people say these kind of laws are reforming the society, but when giving a deeper thought one will realize that these laws are actually 'deforming' the society. If a person really trust in equality, one will never agree that mandatory giving ones hard earned property to someone just because they were married at some point of time is really any kind of justice.
@Bharat You assume that the 'housework' done by the woman is not 'work'. It has no value in your eyes. But you forget that the household chores done by the housewife, literally frees the man to achieve his career progress. All that he earns because of his "hard work" at office is only equal to the 'work' done by the woman at home. Your response is typical- work is valued only when there is a financial transaction involved. To people who can only see money, the only solution is to put a financial value to all that a woman does in a marriage!!! It makes no sense to say that a non-earning wife should not have a share of what the earning husband bought. Agree that every law can be misused. But please do take a holistic view on who suffers more, in general. It is in that respect that Kalapana Sharma's article, makes a lot of sense!
A huge part of the problem are feminist 'scholars' like Prem Chowdhry who publish biased and fraudulent studies, and journalists like Kalpana sharma who write biased and misleading articles. Women activists trained in the West have over decades agitated to remove all due process clauses and fairness & balance from all civil and criminal laws affecting gender relations. The result has been a massive surge in savvy, urban women abusing these laws to file false domestic violence cases and dowry cases in order to intimidate their husbands and boyfriends and take control of property owned by their families. Dowry laws make it possible for them to get their husbands arrested without a shred of proof. The simplistic story that men beat their wives was false, and did not take into account the fact that women are equal participants in violence. As a result, domestic violence has actually increased because when women become violent they know they have the upper hand, thanks to biased laws.
Nitya - I humbly apologize if my comment had cast a contorted view of the women in foreign countries. Many of my close friends are from Europe and I hold them in high esteem. What I meant, was that marriage is not a 'cultural necessity' in European countries (Eg. France). When the couple separates the property earned together during marriage alone will be split not everything the man earned before their marriage or after. There the women may choose to have a one night stand or a just a boyfriend, with no obligation of marriage but here even if the women chose to be with a man for sometime, she can screw him really badly after - our laws are that biased against men. I once again apologize for using the term 'sex mates' but what I meant was that they are not married couples and I wanted to be scientifically correct and contrast it with the Indian scenario. I extend my apologies to anyone offended by my not so right choice of words.
Women should be educated but the laws should be unbiased...where are the words saying that every one is equal before law ???? the whole society should change..the mind set of whole india should change.. men and women should be treated equally both by the law and community..how could any one support the fact that a community treats man to be the upper hand and the law gives the women upperhand???? we should change.... both community and law....
There are lot of anti male laws in India, thanks to the great UPA govt which is busy destroying Indian families. People are thinking its good but after 10 years there wont be any families in India ... All people will be just waiting in the court for getting property rights. One day UPA govt will say "Men do not have right to breathe as women are not getting enough oxygen".... Men need to oppose such laws or else our country will be ruined.
The problem is today's so called egalitarian laws have converted marriage into just a legal contract. In legal terms marriage is merely viewed as contract where a man is supposed to bear the expenses of wife and listen to what so ever she says. I had seen extreme degree of bias where court of law justify any action of wife (a court in Rajasthan even pronounced that a married woman can live with any man of her choice even after being married! Just imagine if the man was living with any other woman than wife, had the court pronounced the same judgement?). Secondly, women are given the right to inherit parental property and at the same time matrimonial property, woman will be getting twice the property and that too without doing any kind of hard work to earn it. This is actually axing man's right on what man has earned by hard labor.
The author here is trying to justify the new law with lack of awareness among women about their rights. So what is the guarantee that even with new law they will be aware? Author is trying to mislead people and is trying to justify another legal terrorism here. If women don't know about their rights today, that is the problem of IMPLEMENTATION of the law and hence we need to focus on better implementation of existing laws and not create new laws. This is highly biased article written only to mislead Indians and break their marriages and eventually increase crime rate in the country..
Simply because some people are ignorant of the provisions of the laws which are supposed to govern them, we cannot refrain from making, amending or modifying the laws. The remedy is to educate them. It is time's glory "to stamp the seal of time in aged things,[and]to blot old books and alter their contents".
Well I think that step taken by the Court signals a inclined sapience driven to women empowerment which is at dearth presently,I just get into quagmire that women are looked chauvinistically in all the societies. Yes it might be the evil born out of evolution but needs to be uprooted out yo have a Harmonious Society, It will rather help in making the bond between the couple go better mu understanding says and in case if infidelity turns the gear hard, Women will be given an equal chance of contesting herself.hats of to our courts and Its revered decision executioners..
It is end of family harmony and any hope for indian husbands. It is clear gender biased and money extorting law for marriages. Even this law is also going to be gender biased. Indian feminist organisations always try to represent misguiding picture of Indian society. In modern times there are rare abla naris but majority of abla husbands. We already have lots of women centric laws which are more than enough to harass and extort money from husbands in case of matrimonial disputes. Even feminists agree that laws like 498a and DV are heavily misused by wives to extort money and settle personal scores. Nowadays more married men are committing suicides than women, divorce rate is on peak that's only reason is women centric laws. They are given all the weapons and tactics and nothing in favor of husbands. Not all women are innocent and not all men are cruel. In most disputes it is wive's parents who are unnecessarily interfere to daughters matrimonial home and cross their limit.
To say that the law will not ameliorate the situation is like throwing the baby out with the bathwater. At least now women have a legal right which was not theirs before. And. for hopes of society reforming itself, it is a very slow process. Every pillar of society is busy in perpetuating the patriarchism which pervades every social interaction. Women have internalized their chains, brainwashed by tradition, culture, religion so much so that men do not need to oppress them any more. We see mothers-in-law actively participating in bride-burning and mothers murdering their own daughters for falling in love. We have also seen how difficult it is for women to fight for their rights. Mary Roy asked for rights in ancestral property and got it after a long battle in which she was vilified by everyone who mattered in the community - all she achieved was to make the males in her community write wills and cut their daughters out. This does not make us give up hope - the fight has to go on.
women in India have perennially donning the role of a victim, silently accumulating legal rights which can only make India a laughing stock of the world:
1. adultery is crime for men, not for women 2. maintenance to wives only, not to needy husbands 3. child custody to mother, father 'allowed' to visit child once/twice a month. 4. now property sharing for wives even if she did not stay with husband. why? because she's woman. men (at least rich men) will stop marrying and that will be the end result of this social engineering.
I appreciate the author for bringing this perspective to us city
dwellers. I would say it involves other parties besides the Govt. to
sort this out
a. First - We shouldn't expect Laws are going change people's life -
It just might guard people. So even if this is going to help Woman in
city's who might be aware of these laws - what is the use of this law
when the abuse is not physical but mental. In today's scenario most of
the woman(working) are going through a lot of mental abuse/pressure
from the 'Man'in the family?
b. In the rural areas, we would need: (i)The Govt. to set up some kind
of booths that would help Woman with their legal problems - ex -
Police station. (ii) We would need lot of support from the NGO sector,
who mostly are in Urban areas, to spread these kind of awareness. To solve the problem in the first point and to have a wholesome approach we would need the Woman herself 'learn' to be more independent both emotionally and financially and stop being the 'weaker sex'.
It's almost laughable how educated urban still want the victim tag . The real sufferings are of the rural indian women and they aren't getting any justice soon
Also , the changes are made in the Hindu marriage act what about other minoritities ?? , this is damaging to our secular fabric
I agree with the author that this law would only benefit the urban and
middle class women because one requires to be educated and informed about ones own rights to take benefits from the law.This doesn't mean women in rural area's are all illiterate but in highly patriarchal societies it is the general tendency to keep women under the men's feet,even when women raise voices about their right.This mindset change among men is also an important aspect to make this law work for every women in rural areas.To make this law effective at the rural grass root level we require more woman representatives from grass root panchayat's who can help concerned women in their villages to be aware of their rights during divorce.Another issues is just by knowing your rights is not enough,the women should have the "supportive structures" like monetary/financial support to pursue any legal expenses.And also emotional support to get over the emotional crisis.
Bharat - you seem to have a very contorted view of women in European countries. They are not sex mates to all men around, and they are treated much more equally than the way men in India treat women. There are many strong family bonds here as well, just as there are in India. Don't come to conclusions based on Bollywood movies that only show women in scantily clad clothes.
Women who are not allowed to work outside turn to Soap operas. What do you want them to do the whole day? Housework is not as easy as you seem to think, which also involves raising kids.
I have been redaing Miss Sharmas Article regularly .I would beg to differ on the opinion of the author regarding the postion of women described by her as dismal.There are instances when women are at fault and they get away with it .Men are not always at fault.IPC 497 ,498 all favour women.The rape laws IPC 376,375 etc are all wpmen friendly.Yes there are places where women are subjugated to a lot of pressure but that is not omnipresent.
People without government authority, acting on their own interest,
whether it is men or women, do work for the welfare of women in rural
areas sincerely and with an aim. But authorities in government, both
women and men are either same in bad or same in good. Here gender makes
no difference. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Women are in high power but why the atrocities against women have not
abated? Because women also have close men relatives in their life.
Kalpana Sharma has presented a dismal picture of women suffering in matrimonial homes. She has ended her article by a note on the futility of laws empowering them without informing them and creating "supportive structures". Laws already made have been been unhelpful. The cases now pending before family courts in the courts are so large that it boggles the mind. When these young people would get justice and get settled in life is anybody's guess.. According a recent report, about 6000 divorce cases are pending in the Kerala courts. Reason for divorce being as trivial as "snoring" to "infidelity".
In my opinion creating more and more laws empowering women, is useless unless we create social conditions conducive to the change. The new laws may create more backlog of pending cases and create more complications in the complex social relations in our country.
I agree with the abuse of the women but that does not justifies the bias against
honest and good men. According to these laws, a man has to share his property
even after the divorce (which carries a big burden in itself), even when the women is
not the bread winner. And trust me, men are not always given a choice in the
marriage. Further, many women are happy to hand over the hard work to the male
counterparts and settle for the Soap Operas. I'm sorry, it is what my research on
various households in chennai and Pondicherry portrays. If marriage is such an arse,
why can't women just be sex mates, like in many european nations? Unfortunately,
men are again penalized by the stupid gender biased laws in India. So, in short, if
there needs to be equality of gender the laws should be fair not biased, then the
disadvantaged would only find ways to survive (it is a natural phenomena), this can
be said of the dowry too...
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