There was no more of the cherubic prankster, or the trademark belligerent swagger of Indian cricket's one time enfant terrible, as S. Sreesanth sat down to address the media in Kochi on Tuesday, his first such after a Delhi court had acquitted him in the spot-fixing case.
The maverick cricketer who loved to pick up a fight with opponents in the field at the drop of a hat had a new-found calmness about him, after the rough patch he had been through.
“There is life beyond cricket,” he said in a measured voice even as he added “forgive, but not forget,” will be his guiding principle for the rest of his life.
And that incidentally, would apply to his relationship with his one-time close buddy Jiju Janardhanan, a friendship, which reportedly landed him trouble and one which he had given up since then.
“I still don’t believe he betrayed me but no friendship is above my family,” said Sree, as he is affectionately regarded by dear ones. But giving up his passion for cricket is lot tougher.
The 32-year-old cricketer’s heart still skips a beat every time he passes along the Kaloor International Stadium where he is an outcast thanks to the life ban slapped by Board of Control for Cricket in India (BCCI).
“Hopefully, I can play an international match in the stadium before I die,” Sree said wishfully even as he recollected his memories of having watched the Little Master Sachin Tendulkar scalp a five-for from the gallery.
The brave demeanour and smile on his face vanished as soon as he was reminded about his 27 days at Tihar jail. “I don’t know whether I have enemies who conspired to land me there, but, even if there are, I would not wish the same fate even for them,” said a tearful Sree who failed miserably to swallow a lump in the throat.
Overcrowded dormitoryThe first five days were particularly gruelling where he had to share an overcrowded dormitory with rape and murder-accused. Even after the release, demons of those days haunted him and drove him to such a state of depression when even thoughts of putting an end to his ordeal forever crossed his mind.
He is eternally thankful to his parents and brother-in-law singer Madhu Balakrishnan to help him realise that there is indeed life beyond cricket.
That gave him the confidence to accept a role with grey shades offered by Bollywood actor-turned director Pooja Bhatt.
A profession he is confident of pursuing if his cricketing dreams are dashed.
