“I would like to meet my biological mother and find out if I have any siblings. I want to know the truth even though it scares me. However, from the bottom of my heart I stand grateful for the wonderful family I have today; I can proudly say I have got the most understanding and caring parents in the world, and honestly I could not ask for anything more,” smiles N.S. Krishnan, a 20-year-old who was adopted a few months after his birth.
Krishnan was among those who attended the annual family get-together organised by the Kerala Adoptive Families Organisation (KAFO) and Department of Social Welfare here on Sunday, as part of creating awareness of adoption in the society.
Over 600 families
There are over 600 families in Thiruvananthapuram, Kollam and Pathanamthitta districts who have adopted children, and most of them believe that it is better for their children to remain sheltered from the truth.
The KAFO and the department, however, think otherwise.
“It is not advisable to keep the fact hidden from the children. If they find it out from another source later in their life, the experience can be traumatic and is likely to lead to bitterness and unpleasant events,” says KAFO secretary P. Krishnankutty Nair.
Gowri Parvathy Bayi, member of the royal family of the erstwhile Travancore, inaugurated the get-together.
The meet included sessions on parenting skills, concerns of parents, misuse of cell phone and internet by children, and drug abuse. A cultural programme was also held.
The meet is aimed at helping address any issues faced by the adoptive families outside the normal challenges in the modern family life, says KAFO president S. Haridas. The adoptive families are divided into small groups that meet once a month. These meetings help facilitate sharing, fellowship, friendship and warmth among the families and children.
Each adoptive family has a story behind their decision. There are some who never had children of their own, some who suffered the loss of their children, and then there are those who adopt for the purpose of giving love and a home to children who have neither.
“We adopted our son Akhil when he was three months old, it was after we lost our child. God took away our son, but he gave us another son. Akhil brought nothing but happiness in our lives. It has been 17 years since we brought our son home; today, when I look at him, I see myself. He even looks and behaves like me,” says Somasekharan Nair, a resident of the city.