It must be incredibly tough to wreck some premises — the premise of a shipwrecked man getting marooned in an island, for instance. I am convinced that it must have involved long nights of hard work to make a film as dull as Robinson Crusoe from a story that bursts with adventure, and draws on the time-tested man-versus-nature premise. Daniel Defoe’s novel Robinson Crusoe is about the triumph of human spirit, and if you are so inclined, it can even be said to have been drawn from colonial history.
The makers of the film, somehow, in the abundance of their wisdom, seem to have decided to interpret Robinson Crusoe’s story from the perspective of the island’s animals.
Targeted at children, plenty of colourful animals abound the film’s universe: a dog, cats, a macaw (which I suspect plays an important character mainly because of its vivid plumage), and even an armadillo.
In fact, at one point, I wasn’t even sure what would come of Robinson Crusoe as the movie descends into a tepid animal adventure film, with the cats, of course, playing spoilsports. Whatever the filmmakers’ grouse with cats might be, I’ll never know.
Everything about the film is pedestrian.
Every now and then, in a badly transitioned scene, you’ll be shown a conniving feline couple saying something as bland as, “Revenge will be sweet!” There’s nothing intelligent, nothing interesting about Robinson Crusoe . Worse, there’s almost nothing funny either. In these Pixar times, the film’s animation reeks of amateur 3DS Max work. The camera, at all times, stays fixed longer than it should.
The makers of the film will likely defend it by pointing out that it is targeted at children.
However, I can’t imagine any child, who is capable of following stories, finding this interesting.
Maybe Infants might find the flashing colours and the saccharine voices amusing; but then they are intrigued by all sorts of noises.
Robinson Crusoe
Director: Vincent Kesteloot, Ben Stassen
Starring: Matthias Schweighöfer, Kaya Yanar, Cindy aus Marzahn, Dieter Hallervorden
Run time: 91 mins