Lead Kindly Light
LEADERS are made, not born. They must have certain qualities that set them apart from the herd. A leader is someone who faces challenges head on. If, in an inebriated condition, he finds himself in the wrong lane and sees an oil tanker hurtling towards him, he must grit his teeth and step on the accelerator while his passengers scream in panic.
A leader is someone who has vision and foresight (not visions and short sight, mind). If there is a chance, however slight, that he may be given an assignment on Tuesday, should he, on Monday show certain signs of a mutating smallpox virus, and make a miraculous recovery three days later.
A leader is someone who knows how to assert himself. If he is in a serpentine queue outside a lavatory, he should be able, with a loud bellow, to announce a sudden yet surprisingly acute attack of uncontrollable incontinence and stride up to the front of the line confident that his position will not be contested.
These are the traits that make a leader a leader. Now, don't get us wrong. We have nothing against leaders. We quite like them in fact. Some of our best friends are leaders too. In dark times, we have all looked up to somebody to be a guiding light, or a battery-powered flashlight at the very least.
The problem here is one of plenty, and not scarcity as some would have us believe. The world is full of leaders. And they, in turn, are full of themselves.
They stand on platforms across towns and cities, yell curses at their rivals in language that would make a hardened sailor blush beetroot, and then ask people to vote for them since they are such honourable men.
They hold fort in boardrooms and strike down plans that cut manufacturing costs by 50 per cent but ratify any strategy that calls for the construction of a swimming pool with a mini-bar on the side for executive benefit.
And every now and again, they score a duck in a crucial cricket match and call it team failure.
What would the world do without leaders? Like the venerable Atlas they bear the burden of mankind through good times and bad. Of course, the fact that they are on vacation during the bad times is more coincidence than the result of deliberate action.
But the problem with leaders is they read too much. That is our beef with them. They buy into obscure theories cooked up by fledgling writers who have little better to do than write meaningless articles about leaders.
On the one hand leaders are told to assert themselves and on the other they are rapped hard on their knuckles for not being more democratic in their outlook. Demand obeisance or ask for a show of hands? Each cell in their spatially challenged cerebellum fights its neighbour over ideological issues.
So, where does that leave the followers? Do they wait and watch striking workers pull the company into the gutter while their leaders contemplate moral conundrums? No. That would be reprehensible.
They could take a vacation and go to Hawaii instead. The sun-kissed beaches are especially beautiful this time of the year. Or, they could utilise this time learning how to play the didgeridoo. It comes highly recommended as being therapeutic, relaxing and frightfully caterwaulish.
Of course, they could always try and come up with a solution themselves, but why bother? The job usually requires the application of better men. Let a specialist handle it, is what we always say. Leaders eventually come through in the end.
At least, that is how it is in the movies, and as we all know movies never lie. They echo reality to a tee.
There are many more fruitful instructions we could give, but as time is of the essence, and public attention at a premium, we must cut this article drastically short, encapsulating the bare requirements of a social service message. Our point is that leaders are also (sometimes) human.
There is too much hype that surrounds their post, and often, that is the cause for failure. Yes, they do have certain skills that push them to the top of the class, but the onus to take initiatives and forge a successful fighting unit is not theirs alone. Only collective efforts will get the desired result. Never be afraid to question the leader. If, at a board meeting, he says the company needs to downsize, ask him why.
If he says the organisation needs to sell its shares in a blue chip firm, ask him how. If he says executives should have access to swimming pools with mini-bars on the side at company cost, ask him when.
This is a privilege that our ancestors didn't have. History books indicate that people who doubted leaders those days, be they HR managers in Alexander's army, or financial advisors to the Czar, did not make much progress. In fact, they lost their heads over it. You, however, have a chance. Make the most of it.
ARJUN SENGUPTA
arjuns.hyd@cnkonline.com
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