I'm the Best?
PERFECTIONIST does not just aim at getting something done; their goal is to do a perfect job. Though they fear disapproval, rejection and criticism, what bothers them most is a shabbily handled job. A perfectionist is often rigid, dominant and fusses over every minor detail. At some point of time many of us tend to have this attitude.
Being a perfectionist can be tough and sometimes not all that rewarding as several negative attitudes are associated with it. For instance:
Perfectionists equate goal achievement failure with lack of personal worth.
Mistakes are viewed as failures. They do not often learn from their mistakes and miss opportunities to grow.
If others notice their flaws, a sense of being unworthy creeps in. They cannot handle disapproval and are filled with thoughts of resentment and failure
Perfectionists have difficulty viewing situations in their proper perspective.
Perfectionists are often structured by an endless list of "shoulds" that serve as rigid rules for how their lives must be led. With such overemphasis they rarely take into account their own wants and desires.
Perfectionists tend to perceive others as achieving success with a minimum of effort, few errors, little emotional stress, and maximum self-confidence. At the same time, they view their own efforts as unending and forever inadequate.
It is not so surprising that many perfectionists tend to suffer from an inferiority complex, thanks to their self - critical attitude. Given such fears, they react defensively to criticism and in doing so frustrate and alienate others. Without realising it, perfectionists may also apply their unrealistically high standards to others, becoming critical and demanding.
We shall overcome ... by
Setting realistic and attainable goals based on your own wants and needs. This will enable you to have greater self-esteem
Experimenting standards for success. This will help you realise that the world does not end when you are not perfect
Evaluating success not only in terms of what is accomplished but also in terms of how much you enjoyed the task. Recognising that there can be value in the process of pursuing a goal.
Learning to distinguish between important and not- so- important tasks. With the latter you can choose to put in less effort.
This will help you not only achieve more, but make you feel better about yourself in the process
Perfection is an abstract concept. The process should get the best out of you while making you feel better about yourself. Like Jonathan Livingston Seagull, it is all in our perception.
SRIVIDYA
srividya.hyd@cnkonline.com
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