Sean Smith, who is called ‘the premier breakthrough coach’ works with business owners and helps them “find their purpose”, besides helping identify what’s holding them back from success. He hails from Southern California and will be in Chennai to talk about the ‘seven deadliest mistakes in goal setting’ and the ‘5 Fs — Fascination, Feedback, Fun, Faith and Fight,’ among other things.
Your seminar will focus on 5Fs, one of which is Faith. At a time when the word is looked at with much scepticism, why, according to you, is faith important?
You are absolutely right about the scepticism in the word “Faith” nowadays. The actual definition of faith is belief or trust in something that cannot be seen. And if you think about it, when we are overcome by fear, we are also believing in something that cannot be seen. So, one of the tricks to overcoming our fears is to simply switch the belief to something positive instead of something negative. For example, people can put their faith into religious views, the Universe, personal growth, oneself, etc.
For instance, if somebody is afraid of taking a risk in business, he can have faith in the belief that he will either succeed with that particular business, or learn some very valuable lessons along the way that will help him with his next business venture.
If somebody is afraid of making a decision as to which career to pursue, he can have faith in his intuition. .
So in essence, when we have faith in the growth process and believe that there is no such thing as failure, only valuable feedback, our fears will be diminished or completely dissolved.
To those who are yet to find professional satisfaction, what is your advice? Why are so many people today unhappy with their jobs?
I believe many people are unsatisfied with their jobs because they aren’t clear on exactly what they want in a career. And since they are not clear about what they want, they settle for a job that may fulfill some of their desires, but not all of their desires. It is ultimately an individual’s responsibility to find a job that is fulfilling. And if the current job isn’t completely fulfilling, he should constantly be trying to find a way to add roles within that job that are fulfilling or continue looking for a new job.
Also, from the other perspective, many employers don’t truly understand what makes employees happy. Most employees want to contribute, be appreciated for their effort, and ultimately be valued as people. But employers tend to think they just want financial rewards. When I speak to employers, I always teach them how to find out what their employees want so they feel included and important, which increases employee loyalty, engagement and retention infinitely.
What, according to you is the secret to achieving the perfect work-life balance?
Flexibility and boundaries. It’s important not to expect our lives to be in perfect balance. In fact, I don’t think that should be the goal at all. Life is always in motion and constantly evolving. Balance usually means equal, still and calm for people. A scale is balanced if both sides are equal in weight. But our lives will never be that way.
Instead of searching for balance, I think one should search for harmony. Think of an orchestra. The instruments don’t play in balance, where each instrument gets an equal amount of time. But they do play in harmony, where each instrument plays its own unique role and supports the sounds of all the other instruments.
In our lives, we should strive to have all the various roles and responsibilities support each other, even though they are not equal in time allotted, importance or intensity. However, even if you only have 10 per cent of your day devoted to a certain task, you can still give 100 per cent of your effort with that small time frame.
This leads into the concept of healthy and clear boundaries. When you have your responsibilities separated appropriately, it is critical that you are fully present and focused when you are inside each individual responsibility. If you are doing one thing, but thinking of another, you will always be less effective in each arena and create the feeling of continually being out of balance.
You have written about finding the support of your spouse for things that move you. How important is it for one’s significant other to believe in your work for you to succeed? Is it important at all?
It is not necessary for our spouses to support or believe in our work, but it certainly helps. Support always feels good for anyone wanting to achieve a goal. But even though our spouse’s support would be great, if you don’t have it that does not mean you should quit your goal if it’s truly significant for you. It is your responsibility to find support for your highest goals, even if certain people won’t give it to you. And the belief you have in yourself is most important, not the belief that others have in you. In other words, your self belief is the cake and other people’s belief in you is merely the icing.
When we expect our spouses to support us, we will often look for ways they are ‘not’ supporting us. And anything we look for we will find. So instead of silently expecting it, clearly ask for the support you are seeking. Many times, our spouses are not aware of how important it is for us to receive their support. Or in some cases, they actually are supporting us the best way they know how, but it is not being received as support by us. So having a clear understanding of what support means to each of you is crucial. It is not worth ruining a relationship over a misunderstanding.
What advice will you give people who are looking to set goals this New Year for themselves? Professionally and personally.
First, take ample time to consider what your goals are and write them down. Studies always show that people who write their goals down are many times more likely to achieve them. The clearer you are, the more chances you have to achieve them as well.
Second, visualise and affirm the achievement of your goals daily. The unconscious mind is a very powerful achievement mechanism, but it does not get engaged unless the goal is clear and inspiring. The more you imagine yourself achieving the goal, the more motivated you will be.
Third, create a clear action plan for each goal. Most people who do set goals stop there. They don’t design a path to get where they want to be. It is usually very inspiring when you see the “how” illuminated for a goal that is important to you.
Fourth, create public accountability by telling other people what you are committing to achieve. I often place my goals in a public forum such as Facebook and even offer consequences for not doing the necessary activities.
Fifth, set yourself up to succeed with a success team. I believe a good success team has five components — a mastermind group, a daily accountability partner, a mentor, a private life or business coach, and constant studying through seminars, books and audio programmes.
Finally, appreciate yourself for your efforts, not just your outcomes. Most people put too much pressure on themselves to achieve their tangible goals, and in that process either sabotage themselves because of the pressure, or create a pattern of always having to achieve another goal to feel happy and important. Give yourself praise for trying, not just for achieving.
(Just Jump will be held on February 27, 6.15p.m. at Sir Mutha Venkatasubba Rao Hall. For details, call 9677077991)
