Who said we can’t win gold at the Olympics? Readers suggest events designed specially for Indians, so that we can leave other countries far behind in the medals tally!

Wordsworth

The game in which we'll surely win the gold medal is “Free Advice”. Whoever you may be, you would not have escaped. For each and everything you do or plan to do, you’ll get advice, sometimes from random people. Whether they follow it or not, they’ll give 100 reasons for us to do so.

B. Sakthi Sangeetha Devi, III Year, Civil, Adhiparasakthi Engineering College, Melmaruvathur

Bargain race

Bargain and reduce the price of an expensive item to the cheapest possible amount. The fastest person to provoke the shopkeeper gets the gold medal.

WOW (Words of wisdom): The person speaking the highest number of “punch-lines” a minute is declared the winner.

J. Vijey Ragvan, 21, Graduate

Footboard gymnastics

The contestants need to perform gymnastics while standing on the footboard of a running bus. The person who manages to do so without falling off wins.

P.G. Sarnya, IT professional

Pipe fight

This is special women-only tournament. A hand pump is placed before the participants. All the contestants have to advance towards the pump at the same time while simultaneously making sure to stop the other participants from advancing towards the goal. The person who fetches the first ounce of water is the winner!

Sathishkumar, IT professional

Traffic-light run

All three medals will be ours as we are the only ones to have understood red, yellow and green as “Slow”, “Fast” and “Faster”...

Priya Shankar, Former Banking professional

Spitting feat

Spit almost anything, from water to tobacco, anywhere — on the handrails, on the walls, or on the main roads; only dirty the place to the maximum extent possible. No doubts, we will definitely leave other countries far behind!

V. ANNAPURANI, III Year, BE (E&I), Sri Sairam Engineering College

Slow race to development

The game of apathetic mismanagement. From chief ministers discussing the next film project with directors on a live terrorist attack site to kids rolling down potholes and being recovered hours later, we Indians would definitely get a gold at that. The other thing I can think of is overprotective parents helping the youth to turn into prototype corporate slaves who haven’t even had a chance to think of being something they’ll be good at.

ABHILASH LENKA, 21, Manipal University

Fizzle-a-thon

Indians generally have a reputation of hyping thing over the top by day and fizzling out even before it gets dark. I haven't met a single person in close to 10 months who has spoken about Lok Pal since it took center stage a year ago. Hence, in a game in which the teams have to bring up a revolution and cripple/fizzle before the others, we have only ourselves to compete with.

BHARGAV KOSURI, College student

Election-athalon

Politics is is in our blood and we are second to none. No matter what the odds or scenario, Indians can truly go to any extent to win an election. Exploiting the sentiments of the masses or distributing freebies or teaming up with the enemy, we know the way to do it.

DHIRAJ KRISHNAMURTHI, Final Year, Civil Engineering

Team events

Tax Evasion: The other game we Indians have an edge over others is tax evasion. Let it be any kind of non monitored business, with the loop holes in our laws, we can always come up with some way of evading taxes.

100 M (Million) Attendance: There is one feat we can achieve with our 120 Million people, Attendance! If there was a medal for attendance we Indians would surely get a gold or silver medal (not sure about the gold with China still around) but we can still go for gold as we have Indians in every corner of the world.

K. BHAVISH, XI, S.B.O.A School & Junior College

Treat-athalon

We love anything that’s on the house. So come up with reasons for why your friend should buy you a drink or a meal that day. From having a broken heart to broken leg… the sillier the reason the brighter the chance at winning the gold.

ADITYA VENKATRAMAN, 24, Fichtner Consulting Engineers (India) Pvt. Ltd.

Dodge the line

The aim is to make it from the end of the queue to the finish point by jumping it at frequent intervals, because that's what we do best; some inconspicuously and others brazenly.

MAHEEDHAR RAMAN, 25, CA

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