Good Grief

February 05, 2014 06:01 pm | Updated May 18, 2016 06:09 am IST - chennai

I am a Std XII student. I was in a relationship for four months with a guy. He was a neighbour of my friend. I was honest. But I realised later that he just wanted to use me. Even my friend did not warn me about it (she was closer to him and hid it from me). He ditched me and I could not bear this. It has reflected on my scores. I’m not able to focus. I end up thinking about him every now and then. And now I’m hurt and left with low scores. I have never faced such a problem in my life. I have less than 45 days for my board exams. Please advise me on how to get over this.

HEARTBREAK KID

It is a really unfortunate situation that you are in right now. However, trying to overcome heartbreak requires a lot of time and energy, both of which you should be using instead for studying, given that there’s only a month left for exams. Start viewing this situation from an objective perspective to help distance yourself from it emotionally: for instance, you’ve dated this guy for four months; if you were a polar bear, that’s basically the time spent on one afternoon nap. You are young and have your whole life ahead to find happiness with someone. Experiencing heartbreak is par for the course (though should preferably be experienced several months ahead of Board Exams). Delete his number from your phone, unfriend him from all social media sites and stay away from your friend to prevent yourself from being distracted. Find motivational pictures to look at while you study – pictures of your dream university, of role models, etc. – so that you can remind yourself of where your priorities lie. Finally, confide in your parents or other trusted adults for support; once they know what’s going on, they can help you stay focussed if you are going off-track. All the best!

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