Looking for a bridge over troubled water? Krithvi Shyam, our young psychologist, addresses your worst anxieties.
I am studying in class X. My mother and I had been best of friends till last year. I shared everything with her but now she does not speak to me and has been avoiding me. If I tell someone that she does not care about me, my mother would say that I’m insulting her. Though I’m getting good grades, this worries me a lot. My situation in school is not that great. I have no one to talk to. When I tried to speak to my mom, she discouraged me and said that I have changed and talked to my friends too much. She thinks I am arrogant and wild. This hurts me a lot. If I shout, she would start crying and I’d feel guilty. I am depressed and losing sleep over this matter. Please advise me.
It sounds like you’re not the only one who is hurt and upset. Something’s clearly going on if your mother’s behaviour towards you has suddenly changed for no obvious reason. Maybe she is feeling very stressed about some event and is unable to share her feelings with you. You’ve realised the hard way that shouting is not going to get you any answers. So the best thing you can do is talk to her gently and openly. Tell her that you miss spending time with your best friend, that it is affecting you negatively, and that you want to know what you can do to rectify this. Reassure her that you will always be there for her in her times of need, just as she has been there for you. Then, give her a chance to explain. If you feel that she is very unhappy or stressed about something, then do not try to tackle the issue yourself. Visit a psychologist with her, and work together to help put this tough period behind both of you.
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