The wedding season is upon us. And here's an irony. Running around to give invitations will make you put on weight! You may wonder how. Going by the sheer number of people we invite, just calculate the number of cups of tea or coffee or glasses of juice in summer one would end up drinking because it's after all, an auspicious occasion. Factor in sweets too. All that's very well. But this isn't about the great hospitality streak in guests. This is about the big fat Indian wedding. Why are we still stuck in that old practice of printing invitations, which will in itself call for quite a few visits sometimes with the whole 'jingbang' to the printing press – selecting cards or placing an order for a particular kind, choosing or should I say debating a design, proof reading and so on. Oh my, that's quite a task in itself. And then personally trooping to hand them over at every home. I must confess that I too plead guilty on this front. The reason for the guilt is that in this age of the social media, it seems like a needless formality. Why can't we as a society accept wedding invitations on facebook with the same grace as we do in person? Imagine the amount of paper, fuel, money aand above all – time, that can be saved.
It's so convenient as facebook gives you instantaneous RSVP options like 'Going', 'Maybe' or 'Decline'. Incidentally, no one bothers about RSVP in the hard copy invitations. Think about it. When was the last time you bought a birthday card and wrote one out to a friend? When was the last time you even posted Easter, Deepavali, Christmas, New Year and Pongal cards? When was the last time you bought an Anniversary Card for your spouse? (I'm not talking about that diamond ring or bracelet!) When was the last time you signed a card to say Congratulations to someone? When was the last time you took the trouble to send a 'Thank You' card in response to a greeting card? We don't need to anymore because most of us have our personal notice board called a timeline on facebook. 'Wishing' is usually on a public platform. So is acknowedging, even if it's a mere Like and not a comment. Except for those who disallow posts on their timelines in which case the option of a direct message exists. Truth be told, the practice of writing cards and sending them by snail mail had an expiry date more than fifteen years ago with the advent of e-greetings with free sites like blue mountain that gave senders options to customise cards. That was for net savvy individuals. There are 100 million of us on facebook in India today. If we can wish our family and friends on different occasions on their timelines, why can't we invite them to weddings and other events through the same medium? For God's sake, there are people even proposing marriage or even announcing break ups on the social media today! That may be over the top but we do need to move on from rituals, don't we? Many are taking the facebook wedding invitation route now by creating it as an event but it's usually in addition to the ritual of personal visits with hard copy invitations. Like a 'play it safe' broad sweeping antibiotic?!
When my cousin in the United States got married recently, she sent out invitations on facebook and e invites to her elderly relatives who were not on the platform. The couple invited all of 75 people! There was a live webcast of the wedding and the video link was sent out to those who could not attend or were not invited. A lavish party was later organised at a community centre for the have-nots. Now how meaningful was that. I dream of the day when we can do something similar here, without being misunderstood by prickly pears whose big fat egos are responsible for the big fat weddings. But for now, how about keeping it simple with a facebook wedding invitation? And, as recipients, how about not feeling slighted by hearing wedding bells on our tablets? Because it's the future. And people have other fish to fry. And oh, don't forget to click on 'going' or 'may be' or 'decline'. At least the caterers need to know.
