Bonding with baby

Tips for expecting fathers waiting for their bundle of joy

May 04, 2016 10:54 pm | Updated 10:54 pm IST

A father with his new born Photo AP.

A father with his new born Photo AP.

Yes, it is the mothers who tend to share a more natural bond with their children that doesn’t need to be cultivated. After all, they carry the baby for nine months, feed her and nurture her every moment since conception. However, we often tend to underplay fatherhood as an experience. Fathers are as eager as mothers to establish an emotional bond with their newborn babies. The only difference being they have to make a special effort to do something that comes naturally to mothers.

If you are an expecting father who is waiting for his little bundle of joy to arrive any time soon, here are some tips for you that would help you cultivate and develop a strong bond with your child in his/her early days in the world. And this practice ideally starts even before the baby is born.

And this practice ideally starts even before the baby is born. The gender stereotypes pervading our society often obstruct men from embracing paternity in a more emotional way since mothers are expected to take care of babies and perform all their chores. However, the more you engage with your child and his/her activities, the more you will bond. So, go all out, clean the child’s nappies, change diapers, feed milk, put him/her to sleep and try to spend as much time as possible. And this practice ideally starts even before the baby is born.

Always visit the doctor with your wife, listen to her instructions and help your wife follow them on a daily basis. Keep a tab of what she is eating and how she is keeping everyday and religiously visit the sonography sessions. Associating closely with the process of the baby’s development inside the womb helps fathers establish a close bond with their babies even before they are born.

Hold the baby as much as possible. Once your little bundle of joy is out in your arms, don’t let her go. It is not just the mother’s job to put the baby to sleep, rock her, or cuddle and carry her if she is feeling colicky. Take initiative in doing all these things. Touch is an essential mechanism to establish an early bond with your child; the more you touch, cuddle and carry the baby, the closer to her you will grow and vice versa.

Holding the baby after every feed for the burp- especially helps bonding with the baby and also contributes in helping the mother as both the mother and the baby are exhausted at the end of the feed and look forward for relaxation.

Feed the baby once a day: Even as your wife breastfeeds the baby regularly, take out time to feed her a bottle in your arms. There is no better feeling for a parent than feeding the baby and watching satisfaction descend upon her as her hunger is quenched. It will also help bring you closer to the baby.

Give child a bath. Bath is one of the most significant early things that kids enjoy. And completing the task is also a delicate one.

Make sure you find time once in a while to administer a bath to your baby all by yourself, from shampooing to washing to dressing her up.

Talk to your baby as they recognise voices even before they are born. Start talking to your wife’s belly in the later months of the pregnancy. Once the baby is out, set aside a daily routine for a brief talk session with her, preferably when she is in a good mood. Look into her eyes and talk your heart out. Some people have a natural knack of striking a conversation with babies, others need time to develop it.

Whatever is the case with you, make sure you talk to the baby every day for a good time, and she will start responding to your voice.

Do her chores. The more you involve yourself in the process of child rearing, the more bonded you will feel with your baby and vice versa. Some fathers are apprehensive about doing something wrong in doing their baby’s chores; there is no need to be, even mothers learn things gradually. Know that changing diapers, cleaning the baby vomit, washing her clothes, etc are not just the mother’s job.

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