When Anurag Kashyap was shooting his (as yet unreleased) first film Paanch , it wasn’t just Kashyap, then a writer, banking on it to herald a new innings, but also the actors in it, especially Kay Kay Menon. With a new kind of gritty realism as the film’s trump card, Menon knew he’d be taken seriously as an actor after it released. But the violence, drug abuse and smattering of cuss words depicted in Paanch was too much for the censor board’s moral fibre.
“When Paanch didn’t release for three-four years, I used to think this is going to come, once this comes people will know my worth. There was no protagonist of that kind [then]. Everybody was a chocolate hero. Even if the film [didn’t] work, I had a feeling I’d get noticed. And then I’d have a say in picking up roles. [But] I kept waiting,” says Menon.
Seeking solace
Years passed by in anticipation. And like all mortals cornered by fate, Menon, too, found himself in the deep well of crisis. Fortunately, he had by his side friends and his wife, Nivedita Bhattacharya. Together, they formed a reading group that would indulge in regular reading sessions. “Fortunately, I had a bunch of friends who were pretty enlightened. We went back to reading writers like [Leo] Tolstoy, [Fyodor] Dostoyevsky, [Maxim] Gorky, [Ivan] Turgenev. Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment and many other books had far greater tragedies than what I was in. This helped a lot in coping with the crisis,” he says.
This initial setback also better paced the actor for life and for dealing with his career.
“I have learnt a lesson that you have to be dispassionately passionate about your work. When you are working, till the last day of that work you have to believe in it absolutely. But the moment you finish it, just cut yourself out. Since the experience of Paanch , once I’m done with the work, I become detached about it. I can joke about it and I’m not clinging on to it any more.”
Working the formula
The actor is currently busy promoting The Ghazi Attack , a Telugu and Hindi bilingual which is based on the mysterious sinking of the PNS Ghazi during the Indo-Pak war in 1971. As evident from the trailer, the film attributes PNS Ghazi’s annihilation to a courageous Indian crew minus any space for any ethical quandary around taking lives. “As far as moral dilemmas in most cases are concerned, forget about the Army, we’re afraid to do so in any field. Moral dilemmas in a superficial fantastical sense have been explored in terms of love and marriages; that’s what generations have identified with till now. But the moment it comes to the military or the legal system, which are not in your day-to-day life, it’s too far-fetched for the audience to really digest.”
Menon feels that Indians are jingoistic by nature. “The audience itself has a psychological disorder in terms of their perception. We are too dynasty oriented. When we see our films, we love to see the nephews and nieces of yesteryear stars, we give them all concessions. If all that weren’t there, then perhaps we can go on to the next step of making other kind of films.” In The Ghazi Attack , Menon plays Captain Rann Vijay Singh, captain of the Indian Navy’s submarine S-21, who believes in certain things that are perhaps not in coherence with the system.
Evolving roles
Menon began his acting career at the tender age of nine, playing a sunflower looking for the sun, and moving along with the light. But he went through the usual grind of expectations that most Indian children face, that is the elixir of a cushy job. In his case, after becoming a Physics graduate, he did his MBA, followed by a career in advertising, marketing, and corporate films. Applying the method of elimination, Menon came to the conclusion that acting was the only thing that made him happy.
“I follow a simple tenet. I don’t play roles, I play people. So, from whatever I get, within that spectrum, I try and discover that person as far as possible and play it on screen. So for me, roles are finite, people are infinite.”
Yet, despite having a regular slew of work, the actor doesn’t always get roles to chew on. Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi, Life in a… Metro, Sarkar, Sankat City, Haider are the few films that offered Menon characters with heft.
“In mainstream films, you perform your role, take your money and get out. Because that’s not going to sell on your name, it’s going to sell on the star’s name. So it is perfectly fine. But when you get films like Hazaaron…, Shaurya, Sankat City or Haider to do, you try and be the person who exists, see how much subtext and depth can be explored. And therein lies your satisfaction, however little that might be. That’s exhilarating enough for you to exist.”
A practical approach
Is he happy with the evolution of his career? To this question, Menon’s expression assumes a Zen-like state. “I have no complaints, because it is inevitable. I really don’t know because there is no end to your hope.”
He feels that pinning your elusive hope to the future and not staying in the present is similar to being like the Hindu mythological figure Trishanku, who was stuck in limbo between desire and a current state of possession.
“I have no dream roles, for example. I keep my dreams and roles [apart]. I don’t really mix them. If I have something in my hand, I devote myself completely to it, and see it to its logical end as far as my contribution goes. The process when I am shooting for 30 or 40 days, that is life for me. Whatever good bad ugly, it’s all out there. Once my job is done, I can’t really do anything about it now.”
Menon feels that a complete of change of ethos to enable good cinema will take a long time, owing to the fact that we are a country that adores its stars.
“You ask any kid, he thinks spreading your arms in the air is acting. It’s not. Standing against the storm fan and walking in slow motion is not acting. It’s not their fault. They have been fed that over a period of time, right from childhood. [It] takes years to change. Once it changes, perhaps people like us won’t be living any more.”
