Karnataka   

Overlong elemental saga

2012 (English)

Cast: John Cusack, Chjwetel Ejiofor, Amanda Peet, Oliver Platt, Thandie Newton, Danny Glover, Woody Harrelson

Director: Roland Emmerich

Apocalypse specialist Roland Emmerich is at it again. While in his earlier films the planet was besieged by aliens (Independence Day), radioactive lizards (Godzilla) and bad weather (The Day After Tomorrow) in 2012 he decides to throw every kind of disaster into the mix with the hope that something will work.

So you have all sorts of elemental mayhem from shattering earthquakes and bubbling volcanoes to tsunamis running berserk on screen.

The special effects are, in a word, breathtaking. Money shots are there for the asking from the crazy car ride to a crazier plane ride, and the big, fat jet taking off even as the runway crumbles beneath it.

But, ah there is always a but! The movie is too long at 150 minutes to keep viewers interested and is also rather lazily written, lumbering with clunky dialogue.

It is almost as if the makers decided not to waste time or money on the script and just waited for the effects to kick in and dazzle the viewer.

The movie starts in India — an Indian scientist, Dr. Satnam Tsurutani (cool name huh?) played with worried intensity by Jimi Mistry — discovers that the earth has come with an expiry date of 2012.

He tells his American scientist friend, Adrian who tells the top brass at the White House.

All governments get together to secretly build an ark in China. Apart from plants, animals and important persons, there are tickets for a berth on the ark at €1billion. Idealistic Adrian is horrified at this rampant evilness and makes many gut-wrenching speeches in between scenes of unbridled destruction. To give a further emotional core to the goings-on is the dysfunctional Curtis family comprising papa Curtis, a cutely dishevelled writer; his cute daughter, rebellious but still cute son, and pretty ex-wife Kate, who is now married to plastic surgeon and part-time flyer Gordon.

There is humour — intentional and unintentional. The one about Governor Schwarzenegger being an actor and reading a script was quite cool.

The all-star cast that includes John Cusack, Amanda Peet, Oliver Platt, Thandie Newton, Danny Glover and Woody Harrelson don’t have much to do apart from run helter-skelter in front of the green screen and collect their big, fat pay cheques.

As mentioned earlier, there are enough bangs for several bucks, but I just wish the dishy Jeff Goldblum was there giving science lessons or even just saying “Oops!”

MINI ANTHIKAD-CHHIBBER

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