The Hindu : I want to talk to a banker...

Online edition of India's National Newspaper
Monday, Dec 23, 2002

Business

Business

I want to talk to a banker...

OF LATE I find that talking to my bank is not the simple act that it used to be. When the bank telephones me, it's generally a marketing person trying to sell me something or a "relationship person'' trying to sell me something. On the other hand, when I telephone my bank, I talk to a disembodied voice, which tells me to press one for something, two for something else and so on all the way to 9. Somewhere along the way the phone gets silent and we have to start all over again.

One warm July afternoon, I was contemplating a siesta, as I am inclined to do on most warm afternoons, when the telephone rang. `Your ABABA Bank has matured', said a female voice, "what do you want to do?'' I did a double take. "What's that you just said?'' "Your ABABA Bank has matured'' she repeated, her tone clearly indicating that she knew that she was blessed with the patience necessary to deal with people who were not too bright. "High time too,'' I said, "they have been around for a few years now and they can't stay immature for ever.'' Now she knew something was wrong and amended her statement, "your ABABA Bank shares have matured,'' she said, "what do you want to do?''

By now I was wide-awake, all thoughts of a siesta banished from my mind. Normally I would have thought that she was making a mistake; shares don't normally mature; but the thought did momentarily cross my mind that some self-styled financial engineer had devised a new instrument. Within a few seconds, however, my brain began to function; "are you trying to tell me that my deposit in ABABA Bank has matured?'' I asked. "Yes, yes,'' she said with immense relief in her voice, "what do you want to do?''

I know exactly what I wanted to do — I wanted to talk to someone in my bank who knew something about banking. I wanted to talk to a banker. I am one of those `old economy' senior citizens who imagines that banks are not run by bankers any more — they seem to have been taken over by marketing wizards and, some people tell me, by techies.

Once some of these banks started focusing on marketing, things started happening especially at the retail end; suddenly "loans'' became "products.'' In the old days when you wanted a "loan'' it was up to you to persuade the banker to part with his money and that was not always very easy. Once it became a "product,'' it became the bank's responsibility to "sell' it to you. So now bank people have started chasing you to persuade you to take loans to buy a house or a vehicle or consumer goods that are lying unsold on retailers' shelves. They try to make you believe that a credit card, the ultimate in unsecured credit, is as much a necessity as fresh air. Every conceivable incentive, from gold coins to discounts on car prices and free weekends at holiday resorts, is offered. The mismatch housing loans can cause or the credit risk attached to the vehicle loans and credit cards are not even at the back of their minds. Their job is to sell; recovering the bank's money is some one else's headache. I would think a real banker looks at life quite differently.

The way some of these people look at credit risk is simply amazing. I was trying to help someone to get a small business going with a small loan; not one of three banks with whom I had deposits would grant the loan against my guarantee. I was pondering over the dim view the banking system had on my credit rating, when I realised that my credit card limits were almost ten times the amount that was refused. "Something wrong here,'' I was thinking to myself when a sweet young thing, from one of the aforementioned three banks, called me on the phone and told me that I had been "specially selected'' for a clean line of credit; they were willing to lend me an amount that was three times what was refused that very morning. "I can give you my fixed deposit with your bank as security,'' I offered. "That won't be necessary,'' she said, "this is a special pre approved limit.'' In the space of a few hours my standing with the bank had dramatically improved! Was it the exorbitant rate of interest that they hoped to squeeze out of me, or was it a marketing target that caused the change of heart? More likely it was a case of the left hand not knowing what the right one was doing. Would a real banker offer a loan out of the blue and then refuse collateral that was voluntarily offered? I think not.

I was banking with an "old private bank,'' when it was taken over by another one, which promptly wrote me a letter promising to take me to a higher level of customer service. The first evidence of the change was in my monthly statement, which I used to get within three days from the end of the month with details telling me to whom I had issued each cheque. I now get the statements after about fifteen days with the only details being "to'' and "by.''

The bank tries to make up for this shortcoming by attaching brochures extolling the virtues of various "products'' on offer. Real bankers know that customers prefer timely and detailed account statements to promotional material.

I could quote any number of instances, but my little ambition remains unfulfilled; I want to talk to a banker.

P. Yesuthasen

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